Blood and Lust
by obsessive-compulsive16
Summary: Takes place between Twilight and New Moon, Alice does not exist. Addison Swan is Bella's cousin and has just moved to Forks after a traumatizing event in Texas. One night, Bella takes her to a party where she meets Jasper Hale.
1. Chapter 1

**APOV**

**  
**I stared out at the rain as my cousin Bella drove us to school. We usually rode in silence, or just talked about school stuff, but today she broke the silence.

"Edward's brother Emmett is throwing a party tonight. You wanna come?" Bella asked. She knew I didn't like large crowds. I shook my head no. "Come on Addi." she pleaded, using my childhood nickname.

"Fine." I gave in quickly. I never could say no to Bella. She was my favorite relative. We walked up to the school, where Bella quickly walked me to my class and then left to go to hers. I had just moved to Forks, Washington a few weeks ago and was still getting used to everything. I didn't want to move, and I would've stayed in that damn psych ward forever, but they said I was 'getting better' and 'recovering' so I needed to be away from the hospital. Thankfully, I got to choose who I went to live with, and of course, I chose Bella and Uncle Charlie.

I went through the motions of a normal school day, at least, normal for me. Bella walked met me at the end of all my classes and walked me to my next one. When school was over, we went home.  
Uncle Charlie's police cruiser was parked outside meaning he was home early. I hoped that nothing was wrong. When we walked through the door we were greeted with the sound of a baseball game on the TV. Nothing was wrong, he just took off early to watch the game. I smiled to myself in relief.

"Hey Dad." Bella called.

"Hey Uncle Charlie." I greeted him. He turned around on the couch for about half a second and muttered a hello to us. We laughed and headed into the kitchen, for me to do homework at the table while Bella made dinner. She was done cooking in about an hour and I helped set the table, like usual. Charlie tore himself away from the game to come and eat with us. We were having breakfast for dinner. Eggs, bacon, and potatoes. Most likely because Bella predicted that neither me or her would be awake in time for breakfast tomorrow. Charlie didn't get the hint. He just sat down and started eating.

"How was your day?" He asked me. I somewhat wished he wouldn't have, but he did this everyday, just to make sure that I was still being a 'good girl'.

"Normal. Just like every other day here." I replied lamely, stabbing a piece of bacon with my fork and bringing it to my mouth.

"How bout you Bells?" he asked Bella.

"Oh, my day was fine. Edward invited a few people over tonight and I was wondering if Addi and I could go?" Bella half asked. Uncle Charlie looked at me, and I nodded feigning enthusiasm.

"Sure, but be home by midnight." Charlie said in his cop voice. I laughed a little at the change in his voice and Bella smiled. She nodded and we finished the meal in silence. When it was finally 8 o'clock, Bella and I headed out to the Cullen's house. I had never been there before, in fact, I hadn't been anywhere in Forks except the school and Bella's house, so I was nervous. When I came back to the present, Bella was parking her old Chevy near the Cullen's very large house. There were so many cars, I wasn't surprised, just worried. A boy, I assumed it was Edward, Bella's boyfriend, appeared next to the car and opened the door for her. I jumped out of my side and walked around the car to stand with Bella. I saw Edward give her a quick kiss before turning his attention to me.

"Edward," Bella started, moving closer to me, "this is my cousin Addison." He stood a little closer to me and smiled.

"Hello Addison, I'm Edward." He greeted me sweetly. I smiled wide, and felt just a little bit calmer because I knew Bella would have him watch for me during the party. "Shall we?" he asked, holding out his arms. Bella took his left and I took his right comfortably. More comfortable than I had been with anyone other than Bella in Forks so far. I decided this night was going to be a success. When we got into the house however, my mind changed. There were so many people. Edward let go of Bella and me and whispered something to her before disappearing into the crowd. I got a little nervous. Bella sensed this and grabbed my hand, pulling me through the crowd. She pulled me through the crowd obviously trying to find someone to stick me with so she could go and be with Edward. I didn't blame her, if I had a boyfriend, I would rather spend time with him than my 'crazy cousin'. Before I knew what was going on, she was being pulled one direction and I was being pulled another. We got separated and I got scared. I had to find a way to get away from all these people before it turned into a full-scale panic attack. I ran up the stairs that were also filled with people and pulled open the first unlocked door I came to. I shut the door behind me and stood with my back on the door and my eyes shut, breathing deep.

"Can I help you?" a soft, somewhat annoyed male voice asked. It startled me. I kept my eyes shut tightly.

"Too many people." I stammered quietly, still not looking at him.

"Why did you come then?" he asked softly. He sounded sweet, and yet, hard and angry.

"My cousin made me." I said in a rush.

"Well, you shouldn't have let her take you." he said sounding a little more annoyed than before. "Are you just going to stand there?"

"Uh.." I didn't know how to answer. Finally, I opened my eyes. I was looking at a stunningly beautiful, practically indescribable boy around my age, and he stared back with sweet honey-golden eyes. My legs gave out and I was sitting on the floor. He laughed a small laugh.

"Well, I guess you're not standing anymore, but that's not what I meant." he said with a little smile. I didn't understand at first, but then I remembered that he said, 'are you just going to stand there'. I tried to smile, but I was still a little too nervous. He looked straight into my eyes. "Would you like a chair?" he asked pointing to a black leather chair in a corner of the room. I wasn't sure if I could stand up and I didn't want to embarrass myself by falling down right in front of him. He laughed a little when I didn't answer him. He got off the bed and walked over to me, offering a hand to help me up. I took it, his hand was ice cold, and stood up. I staggered and he caught me around the waist, letting my hand go quickly. He pulled me over to the chair, his arm firmly around my waist the whole time, a big smile on his face. He set me down and went back to his bed. I just sat there, watching him read a book, for who knows how long. Finally he spoke.

"What is your name?" he asked, not even looking up from the book.

"Addison, but most people call me Addi." I said nervously.

"Addi." he repeated, looking up at me. "I'm Jasper." He looked back down at the book. Once again, all I did was watch him read until finally he broke the silence.

"Did anyone see you come in here?" he asked sharply. The edge in his voice caught me off guard.

"I don't think so." I stammered.

"Good." he said quickly, still sharply. I took offense at that tone, but instead of getting angry, my eyes started to tear up. Before I could stop it, I was crying. Soon, I wasn't just crying, I was sobbing. Jasper was sitting on the edge of the chair and had his arm around my shoulders. "Don't cry." he shushed soothingly. I suddenly felt very calm and stopped crying. He was on his bed reading again before I was finished wiping the remaining tears from my cheeks. I was amazed at how quickly he calmed me down. Sometimes I used to cry for hours, but he stopped me in a matter of minutes. I started staring at him again. I just watched him for what felt like hours when I decided to talk.

"Do you know what time it is?" I asked cautiously.

"Half past midnight." He said. Then I panicked. I was supposed to be home by midnight. What if Bella already left? I thought to myself. Jasper must have read my expression. "What's wrong?" he asked, walking toward me.

"I was supposed to be home by midnight!" I said in a panicked voice. Jasper sat on the edge of the chair again and rubbed my shoulder soothingly. I calmed down a little.

"What would happen to you, were you not to make it home strictly at midnight?" he asked calmly. I didn't trust my voice, but he asked, so I had to answer.

"Uncle Charlie could come and bust up the party, ground me, or even send me back to Texas." I said. He seemed to recognize the name Charlie. Maybe he knew my uncle. He was the Chief of Police here in Forks. I didn't even mean to say the last part about Texas, but looking into Jasper's eyes made me blurt out just what I was thinking.

"Charlie?" he asked. "As in, Charlie Swan?" I nodded and he seemed to relax a little more. "So you are Bella's cousin." he said, smiling again. I didn't understand why he wasn't more worried about the Chief of Police coming into this house to get his crazy niece back home. "I've heard a little about you." I was worried. What did Bella tell Edward? More importantly, what did Edward tell his family?  
"What have you heard?" I asked worriedly. Same as before, I was calmed almost the instant I became the slightest bit uneasy.

"Nothing really. Just that you moved here from Texas and that you had a traumatic experience there." he said. I could feel what was coming. "What more is there?" he asked. I didn't want to answer. I looked into his eyes and felt an odd, foreign emotion. It felt like, nerves, but somewhat like the feeling you get when you develop a crush on someone. I smiled a little and Jasper took his arm off of my shoulder, looking just a tiny bit embarrassed. I wondered why. He hadn't done anything to embarrass himself. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." he said quietly, nervously.

"It's okay." I said, touching his arm. "I don't even talk to Bella about it." When I said her name I remember the whole problem of being past my curfew. I grew panicked again. Jasper could somehow sense this and snaked his arm around my waist, calming me and pulling me up from the chair. He knew why I was upset.

"The party has ended for the most part." He said, reassuring me as we walked slowly to the door. "No one will notice us." I didn't understand why he wouldn't want anyone to see him with me. He was probably lying about how much he knew about me and didn't want to be seen with Bella's crazy cousin. We walked out the door and to my surprise, he was right. There were only a few people still there and they were absorbed in there own thing so they wouldn't notice us. Jasper took me through the living room to the kitchen where Bella sat, looking worried.

"See, I told you she was still here." Edward said, rubbing Bella's back soothingly. Jasper let me go right before Bella jumped up and enveloped me in a tight embrace. Then she pulled away and looked at Jasper questioningly.

"She ran into my room, trying to escape the party." he said to her. "She claimed you made her come." At that, Edward looked at Bella disapprovingly.

"I thought it would be good for her." Bella said sheepishly. Edward pulled her aside and whispered something low into her ear that I didn't hear.

"Well, I didn't know." Bella answered his whisper a little louder. I looked at Jasper, but he was paying close attention to Bella and Edward's quiet conversation. "Okay, okay." Bella finished.

"So Jasper took care of you?" Edward asked, looking me directly in the eye. His eyes were the same color as Jasper's.

"Yes." I said quietly.

"We better get home before Charlie comes out here." Bella said turning to Edward for a goodbye kiss. I was a little jealous that I wasn't getting one of those. Just then, Jasper wheeled me around and brushed his lips against my cheek sweetly. I tried to hide me goofy grin when he pulled back.

"It was nice meeting you, Addi." He said. I nearly melted when he said my name. His voice was like music. Bella grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the house and into her truck. She pushed it as fast as it would go and before I knew it, we were back at Uncle Charlie's. The light was visible through the curtains in the living room. He had waited up. Bella and I braced ourselves for whatever he was going to throw at us and walked into the house, side by side.

**JPOV**

Emmett was throwing another party. I hated when he threw parties, because I was stuck in my room the entire time. I was the outcast, the leper. I had been working on my self control. I could be in a room with at least 100 humans and stay for around 2 hours. That was very good. Carlisle had been teaching me more self control because I longed to be more accepted. Of course I would never tell him the true reason behind it. I claimed it was so I would be more comfortable around Bella.

I sat in my bedroom, on the king sized bed I didn't need, reading a novel for probably the hundredth time when a girl ran in my room and shut the door hard behind her. I stared at her, waiting for her to say something, or at least open her eyes. I could feel the fear emanating from her. She was terrified. I wanted to help, but I couldn't seem too forward.

"Can I help you?" I asked, sounding a little more annoyed than I actually was. She shuddered at the sound of my voice.

"Too many people." she whispered. I wanted her to look at me and see that I was no apparent danger, so that she could calm down. Then I wondered why she would come to a high school party if she didn't like to be around people.

"Why did you come then?" I asked, trying to make my voice sound soft and comforting. It came off hard and angry. Of course I wasn't fond of human teenagers running into my room at random, but she was scared and obviously needed comfort, so I tried to push the anger away.

"My cousin made me." she answered. Cousin. I wondered briefly if this was Bella's cousin. They had the same brown hair, except this girl's was straight as a pin, whereas Bella's hair was curled.

"Well, you shouldn't have let her take you." I concluded. I felt bad seeing her standing there, eyes shut tight, looking like she was about to collapse. I wanted to offer her a chair. "Are you just going to stand there?" I asked, once again coming off more harshly than I meant to be.

"Uh..." she stammered. Then it happened. She opened her eyes and then I was staring into the most beautiful green eyes I had ever seen in all of my 165 years. She seemed stunned at the sight of me, her eyes growing wide and taking all of me in. Then she collapsed, just as I had feared, but she was so beautiful, I just had to laugh.

"Well, I guess you're not standing anymore, but that's not what I meant." I said with a hopefully comforting smile. She looked like she was trying to smile, but I could feel the nerves flowing from her. I tried to make the room calm, but I just couldn't concentrate on anything but her amazing eyes. "Would you like a chair?" I asked softly, pointing to my favorite black leather chair. She just looked at me, like a deer caught in the headlights. I laughed a little again, and got up to offer her a hand unthinkingly. I helped her up, but she staggered back, so I released her hand and caught her around the waist. I walked her to the chair and set her down, smiling because I was so much in control. I went back to my bed and resumed staring at the pages of the book. I wasn't reading, just trying to think of things to say to the girl. Then I realized I hadn't yet learned her name.

"What is your name?" I asked, not looking into the beautiful eyes.

"Addison, but most people just call me Addi." she said, nervousness once again becoming her primary emotion.

"Addi." I said, looking into her marvelous eyes again. "I'm Jasper." I looked down at the book again and then realized that, if Rosalie had seen Addi come in here, and not come out, she would be furious. "Did anyone see you come in here?" I asked sharply, trying to cut out the edge in my voice.

"I don't think so." she said quietly and nervously. There was almost a hint of pain in her tone.

"Good." I said mostly to myself. Then her emotions changed. First to anger, then quickly to a sort of tormented sadness. Then she was sitting in the chair, sobbing. I felt awful for making her feel that way, so I rushed over to her side and put my arm around her shoulders, quickly calming her. "Don't cry." I said calmly. Soon, she finished crying and I went back to the bed. My self control was amazing me tonight. I smiled to myself, but hid it from her view so she wouldn't think I was laughing at her. She just sat there and stared at me. I kept looking up the slightest bit to stare into her eyes. She never noticed. Then she spoke.

"Do you know what time it is?" she asked in a guarded tone. I looked at the clock on my bedside table.

"Half past midnight." I answered. I could feel her panic. I had to ask, "What's wrong?" I got off the bed and started walking toward her, preparing to calm her again.

"I was supposed to be home by midnight!" she screeched. I sat on the chair again and rubbed her shoulder, calming her.

"And what would happen to you, were you not to make it home strictly by midnight?" I asked calmly.

"Uncle Charlie could come and bust up the party, ground me, or even send me back to Texas." she stated sadly. Charlie. This was Bella's cousin.

"Charlie? As in Charlie Swan?" she nodded, and knowing that she was the cousin of my brothers girlfriend made me the slightest bit more relaxed. "So you are Bella's cousin." I smiled at my correct assumption. "I've heard a little about you."

"What have you heard?" she asked me, becoming nervous again. I quickly calmed her. I enjoyed doing that.

"Nothing really. Just that you moved here from Texas and that you had a traumatic experience there." I said. I was concerned with the way she asked so I added, "What more is there?" She looked up into my eyes. Her amazingly lovely eyes stared into mine and then I felt it. It was strange and foreign. It felt like, like I loved her. I must have been giving off that emotion because she smiled and I quickly took my arm off her shoulder, embarrassed that I was telling her I loved her. She looked confused. "I'm sorry," I said, "I shouldn't have asked." She reached out and touched my arm.

"It's okay." she said, slowly rubbing up and down my arm. "I don't even talk to Bella about it." Then panic hit her again. I placed my arm around her waist and helped her up from the chair.  
"The party has ended for the most part." I told her. "No one will see us." I opened the door with my free hand and took her out of the room. I walked her down the stairs, keeping a secure hold on her the entire time. We went through the living room to the kitchen, where, just as I predicted, Bella was sitting, worrying.

"See, I told you she was still here." Edward said to Bella, trying to soothe her. Bella jumped from the chair and, just as I let her go, wrapped Addi in a tight hug. Edward looked up at me questioningly, and, when Bella let Addi go, she did the same.

"She ran in my room, trying to escape the party." I said. "She claimed you made her come." I gave Bella a somewhat disapproving look and Edward did the same.

"I thought it would be good for her." she tried to explain. Edward pulled her aside.

"With the kinds of things she was thinking, it was not good for her." Edward whispered so low I doubted Addi could hear him.

"Well, I didn't know." Bella whispered back, a little louder.

"I know he's been working on his self control, but Jasper could have hurt her. That would have been bad for everyone. Do not take her to any more parties, whether they be here or anywhere else." Edward commanded. I got a tiny bit angry at his condescending words.

"Okay, okay." Bella said. They turned back to us.

"So Jasper took care of you?" Edward questioned.

"Yes." Addi stated simply, nervously.

"We better get home before Charlie comes here." Bella said to her. She turned to Edward for a kiss. I was determined to prove my self control to him, so when I was sure he could see, I turned Addi to face me and brushed my lips against her cheek softly, and sweetly. She smelled so good, but I couldn't let that show. I pulled back to see her smiling an amazing grin at me. I smiled widely back.

"It was nice meeting you Addi." I said. She smiled even wider. I laughed a little as Bella pulled her out of the kitchen. Then I turned to an angry and surprised Edward.

"What were you thinking?!" he questioned angrily. I just smiled.

"I have self control too, you know." I said, trying to be condescending.

"Rosalie will not be pleased with this." he said. I shrugged.

"Why do I have to please her?" I asked, getting a little angry. He got to have Bella, which angered Rosalie to no end, but I couldn't have Addi.

"You are not me." he said, a reply to my thoughts. I was about to answer when we were interrupted.

"Who was she?!" Rosalie yelled angrily. I tried to make the room calm, but was interrupted again. "Don't you dare try to calm me down!" she yelled. "Now answer me."

"Addison, Bella's cousin." I answered quietly, not looking at her.

"What was she doing in your room?" she questioned even more angrily.

"She doesn't like large crowds. She just ran in there." I answered.

"You should have kicked her out and locked your door." she said.

"Why?" I asked honestly.

"Because you do not have that level of self control and she is a lunatic!" Rosalie yelled. Then I got angry.

"Do not say that about her." I said through my teeth.

"You know what Edward told us. She likes to see her own blood. She cuts herself up just to watch herself bleed!" Rosalie accused. I flung myself at her. How dare she say those things about Addison?! Edward and Emmett quickly caught me and held me back. I let a low growl escape. Rosalie was offended.

"See what I mean. I insult your little girlfriend and you loose all control." she said decisively.

"Rose." Emmett cautioned.

"I would never hurt Addi." I managed to say. It was the truth.

"That's what you think now, but I'm not letting this continue." Rosalie said.

"What do you plan to do about it?" I asked angrily.

"Either you stop seeing that girl or I call Carlisle and tell him everything." she said. I knew that she meant everything. The party, Addi being in my bedroom for hours, and me kissing her. I was so sad. If I could cry, I would have been at that very moment.

"Fine," I said, quickly running to my room. I locked the door and sat on the bed, putting my hands over my face and letting the tearless sobs escape.


	2. Chapter 2

**APOV**

When we walked into the house, Charlie seemed mostly relieved to see us home. Then the anger set in.

"You two were supposed to be home an hour ago." he said in a stern voice. I hid behind Bella just a little.

"Sorry Dad." Bella said quietly. Her voice seemed tired. Uncle Charlie must have been able to hear it too.

"It's okay." he said. "Just go to bed." Bella and I walked up the stairs to her room. I mostly slept on the pull out couch in the living room. Some nights, if I'd been crying, Bella would let me take her bed and she would sleep on the couch. She went to bathroom to take a shower and I went to brush my teeth. Then we traded places. When we were both done getting ready for bed, I was about to make my way downstairs when Bella told me to come to her room.

"Can we talk?" she asked. I nodded and went back into her room. I sat with her on her bed.

"What's up?" I asked curiously.

"What were you doing with Jasper tonight?" she asked, avoiding my eyes. I laughed a little.

"What do you think, Bella?" I laughed.

"I don't know." she answered quietly.

"It's okay, I just sat there and stared at him all night. Promise." I said. She looked at me, and decided I was telling the truth.

"Good." she said. "Did you talk to him at all?" she asked.

"Yeah, a little. He told me his name. Asked me for mine. And that was pretty much it." I said.

"Okay." Bella said. "Did you make any physical contact?" she asked. That was an odd question.

"Yeah, he helped me up when I fell on the floor and he pulled me over to a chair. Then later, when I was crying, he put his arm around me and calmed me down. He did that like twice. Then," I sighed happily, "he kissed my cheek."

"Did anything about him seem weird to you?" she asked.

"Um," I said, thinking, "his eye color. His eyes were golden. And he was really cold." I said. "Other than that, it was pure sexiness." I concluded. Bella started laughing and I joined in. Bella's laughter was interrupted by a huge yawn. "Time to go to bed?" I asked.

"Yep." Bella said. I went downstairs to the living room and set myself up on the couch. I was asleep soon. Bella woke me up around 2pm.

"Addi, get up and get dressed, we're going to the Cullen's house." Bella said. I rubbed my eyes sleepily.

"What?" I asked, not completely comprehending what she was saying.

"Edward said that Jasper needed to talk to you. So get up!" she said. When she said Jasper's name I was instantly awake and up, getting dressed and ready. I wore my best t-shirt and my favorite black skinny jeans. Of course, I wore my black hoodie. Edward was waiting for us in his shiny silver Volvo outside the house. Bella sat in the passenger's side and I got in the back seat. We were to Edward's house very quickly, a lot quicker than we would have been if we were in Bella's truck. I followed Edward and Bella into the house and saw Jasper sitting on the couch in the living room looking worried. Without thinking, I walked quickly over to him and sat with him, putting my arm around his shoulders.

"Hey Jasper." I said softly, rubbing his shoulder. He didn't look at me.

"We need to talk." He said.

"I'm here. I'm listening." I said, hopefully comforting him.

"We can't see each other anymore." he said quietly.

"What?" I asked, in shock. I thought he liked me.

"I really like you, but..."

"I think you should leave." a female voice spat from across the room. Jasper shrugged my arm off his shoulders and put his face in his hands. I just stared at Jasper, numb.

"I'll drive you home." Edward said, startling me. He offered me a hand and I took it. He put his arm around my shoulders in a comforting gesture, but nothing was going to help now. He led me to his car, where Bella was already seated in the passenger seat. He opened the door for me and I got in, trying not to cry, but I wasn't successful. I started crying before Edward even started the car. I was embarrassed and tried to stop crying, but wasn't able.

"It's okay to cry." Edward said softly, as if he knew what I was thinking. I just cried harder. The minute he turned the car off, I ran into the house and to the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I pulled open my personal drawer and fished for the thing I wanted. Then I found it, a brand new razor. I slowly slid it across my arm. It didn't help, so I pressed harder and then the blood started to appear. I made another semi-deep cut and watched the deep red flow from my wrist, down may arm and drip slowly on the counter. It eased my emotional pain. I couldn't feel anything except the pain, and the hot liquid coming from my wrist. Then I heard a knock on the door.

"Addi!" Bella yelled, concern lacing her tone. "Are you okay?" I quickly turned on the water and rinsed my cuts, then covered them with the sleeve of my hoodie.

"Yeah," I said, sounding a little more convincing than I should have.

"Will you come out of there?" Bella asked. I opened the door. Bella had no idea what I had done and I was grateful, but I couldn't do it again.

The rest of the night went on like a normal night would. Bella cooked dinner, Charlie came home, ate, and then found some game to watch on TV. Bella and I sat up in her room, doing homework, but kind of ignoring each other-we didn't really have anything to talk about-and then it was time for bed. I was nervous to go to bed because I didn't want to dream of Jasper. I didn't want the pain to come back. Bella was on her computer, and I was doing some homework on her bed when she turned to me.

"I'm beat. You ready for bed?" she asked.

"I guess." I said quietly, she knew why I didn't want to sleep.

"You can sleep up here tonight, I'll take the couch." she said, shutting off the computer and coming over to the bed. She sat down and put her arm around my shoulders. "It'll be okay." she said. She was lying and I knew it. Nothing would be okay until I could be with Jasper, or at least find out why he couldn't be with me. Bella and I got ready for bed-I was careful not to let her see my arms-and she put me to bed, as if I was a child. "If you need anything, you know where to find me." she said. I faked a smile and she left. As soon as she was gone, I started thinking about Jasper. To get my mind off of him, I got out of bed and went to Bella's computer. I waited for it to turn on and then searched through some of the files she had saved. There were a lot of essays, and then something else caught my eye. There was extensive research on...vampires. I looked through the files, read some of the articles, and they were very interesting. I had no idea Bella was goth, I thought. At least it took my mind off of Jasper. I looked at the clock and saw that it was almost 1am. I decided to turn off the computer and go to sleep. When I got into the bed, I realized how tired I really was and got to sleep quickly. Although I tried hard not to think about him, I dreamt of Jasper. Jasper holding me, Jasper kissing me, Jasper pushing me away.

"I can't be with you!" he yelled. "I'm a blood thirsty monster!" I fell to my knees at his words and put my hands to my neck. I felt small holes on my throat and looked back at him. His perfect golden eyes were red, his hair was disheveled, and his mouth was dripping with blood, _my_ blood.

I woke up screaming and Bella ran into the room. I clasped my hands to my throat and felt, no holes. Then I realized I was crying.

"Are you okay?!" Bella asked urgently. I looked around the room and saw Uncle Charlie standing at the door, looking alarmed.

"What time is it?" I asked quietly. Bella looked at the clock.

"4:30." Bella replied. I didn't want to go to back to sleep, but it was too early. I got up and went to the bathroom, ignoring everyone and everything else. I washed my face and went back into the bedroom. Bella was still sitting on the bed when I returned, but Uncle Charlie had gone back to bed. I sat with Bella.

"What happened?" she asked quietly.

"I had a dream," I started, and then my nose burned with the promise of oncoming tears, "about Jasper." I was crying now. Bella pulled me into a hug and held me while I cried. I fell into a thankfully dreamless sleep after a while and woke around 3pm. I put my hoodie on over my pajamas and went downstairs. Bella was sitting with Edward on the couch and I smiled when they looked at me.

"Feeling better?" Bella asked. I nodded. I was feeling a little better, not much though. "Want something to eat?" she asked, getting up. Without waiting for my answer, she was heating up some food in the microwave for me. I was left standing in the living room with Edward.

"Bella told me you had a nightmare." he said softly. I nodded. "I'm sorry." he said sincerely. I didn't want to think about Jasper, let alone talk about him, but I needed to know.

"Has Jasper said anything about me at all?" I asked quietly. I saw a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

"Yes," he replied simply. I didn't need any further explanation. I was just happy that he still thought about me. I went into the kitchen and ate what Bella made for me. Then I just went back to her room and stayed there for the remainder of the day. I barely did anything, except think of Jasper. He was all I could think about. By the time I was ready to go to sleep, I decided it would be okay if I had another dream about Jasper. I slept on the couch again. When I woke up, I realized that I hadn't dreamt of anything. I was so happy. I got up, got ready for school, ate breakfast, and then walked out the door to Bella's car, bracing myself for another probably bad day.

**JPOV**

All night I sat thinking of ways to tell her I couldn't see her again. 'Addison, I just can't be with you.' 'I'm not good for you.' I rehearsed inside my head until I heard a knock on my door around 11am. I opened it to see a very anxious Edward standing there.

"What?" I spat angrily. I was in no mood to talk.

"I'm going over to see Bella, would you like me to bring Addison here?" he asked. I nodded my head sadly. He was gone just as soon as he appeared and I went down to the living room to prepare for one of the most difficult things I had ever done in all my life. Edward walked in first, followed closely by Bella, and then she walked in. I couldn't look at her, so I just turned my eyes to the floor. She walked over and put her arm around me. I wanted to hug her tight and never let go, but I couldn't.

"Hey Jasper." she said quietly, rubbing my shoulder softly. I had to do this.

"We need to talk." I said, trying to keep my voice strong and even. She got nervous.

"I'm here. I'm listening." she said comfortingly. It didn't help.

"We can't see each other anymore." I said, so quietly I hoped she didn't hear me. She did. Her mood changed from nerves back to the tormented sadness she had at the party. I wanted to calm her, comfort her, but I couldn't.

"What?" she asked, her voice strangled. I couldn't see her cry or I would lose it.

"I really like you, but..."

"I think you should leave." Rosalie interrupted. I just sat, waiting for her to leave.

"I wasn't finished talking to her!" I shouted at Rosalie, my voice doing a sharp crescendo as I said it.

"You told her what she needed to know." she said. She was in a happy mood. I would not stand for that. I stood up and ran over to her, pushing her up against the wall and spit on her. She screamed at me and pushed me off of her and then we were fighting. I was about to bite her when someone pulled me off. I growled and bit them instead. Edward yelled, and I realized that I bit him.

"I am so sorry." I said to him as he rubbed his arm.

"It's alright," Edward said. I was shocked that I could do such a thing to my brother, and was starting to think that ending things with Addison was a good idea. "No," Edward responded to my thoughts, "you were mad at Rosalie, this has nothing to do with Addison." I was still upset and needed to remove myself, so I ran out of the house, jumped over the river, and ran deep into the forest to be by myself. I thought about Addison, about biting Edward, about controlling myself, and about how I could see Addi without Rosalie knowing. There was no way to keep it from Edward. He would hear me thinking about her. There were supposed to be no secrets in this family, but I needed Addison. I loved her.

I sat and thought about this for hours. I stayed out over night, and most of the next day, just thinking. I realized there was no way. I would just have to deal with the pain it caused me. It would be hard, but eventually, she would be out of my life. I would never forget her, but I could not be with her. I ran back to the house when it was dark on Sunday night. I wondered briefly if Carlisle and Esme had come back yet.

When I got back to the house I avoided everyone and went to my room, locking the door behind me. I lied down on my bed and closed my eyes, concentrating on calming myself. I was successful in making myself calm, but not for long. I was thinking about Addison and school, and seeing Addison _in_ school. My thoughts were interrupted by a hard knock on my door.

"Jazz, come on. It's time for school." Edward said through the door. I got off the bed, changed my clothes, and met Emmett by his Jeep. He threw his keys at me.

"I'm riding with Rose." was all he said. He was angry with me for attacking Rosalie, and I didn't have to be Edward to know that. I drove the Jeep to school and parked far away from Emmett and Rosalie. I didn't even want to see her. I didn't care if she was my "sister", I might hurt her if I get too close. I walked into my first class and sat in my back row seat. I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples, trying to concentrate on school and not the prospect of seeing Addi. I got through my first four classes, and then it was time for lunch. I didn't want to see Addi, but I knew that I would. I thought about skipping lunch, but the part of me that wanted so badly to see her got me into that lunch room and sitting at a table, alone.


	3. Chapter 3

**APOV**

As I got out of Bella's car, I searched the parking lot for Jasper. Of course I didn't see him. On the way to my first class, I thought I saw him, but when I turned around, the boy I thought I saw was gone. I was barely able to concentrate during my first class, and it got worse as lunch drew closer. I knew I would see him, everyone sees everyone at lunch. I took a deep breath and walked through the door into the cafeteria. I didn't look around at first, just got my lunch and sat with Bella. Then I heard something I wished I didn't.

"Jasper Hale is staring over here." I heard one of Bella's friends, I think her name was Jessica, whisper to another girl. I didn't want to look, but curiosity overtook any rational thought and I turned around to see Jasper quickly look down at the untouched food in front of him. Bella lightly turned my head back to the food in front of me.

"Don't look at him." she whispered quietly to me. I picked at my food for the remainder of lunch, barely eating. I was looking at the ground as I walked out of the cafeteria, and I bumped into someone, dropping my binder in the process.

"Watch where you're walking." a voice said, while the person handed me the binder. I looked up and saw the retreating form of Jasper. I smiled stupidly. He talked to me! Bella walked by and grabbed my arm, pulling me to my next class, which was gym. I went to the locker room, changed my clothes, keeping my hoodie on. I walked out to the gym, and saw Jasper sitting in the bleachers in black sweat pants and a white t-shirt. Part of me wanted to run out and hide in Bella's car for the rest of the class, but another part, the stronger part, wanted me to stay and stare. I just went on like normal, casting occasional glances at him.

It went like this for the next few weeks, seeing Jasper at lunch and then in gym. I would stare for a while, and then look away. Sometimes I could swear I felt his eyes on me, but every time I looked, he was looking somewhere else. There were times when the stupid part of me made me purposefully fall in front of him just to see if he would help me up. He never did. I just ended up making myself look like an idiot, and then crying a tiny bit in the locker room afterward. Some nights, I would dream about him, waking up sweating and crying. Then I would either just sit, or turn on the television, putting it on mute, and reading the captions for whatever show was on. I never fell back to sleep the same night I dreamt of Jasper. The days after those nights were especially hard, because when I would look at him, I would see the dream Jasper, the evil blood drinker. I'd had several small panic attacks when that happened and Bella took me out of the cafeteria and calmed me down quickly. She was so understanding, and I didn't understand it, but welcomed it. Then, one day, about a month and a half after Jasper and I met, something happened.

I walked into the locker room and got dressed and then went into the gym, like usual. The coach announced that we were playing indoor soccer today. Just another way for me to fall, I thought unhappily. Jasper and I were put on the same team. I guess this can be a good thing, I thought while having different fantasies about Jasper helping me up if I tripped.

The game was going well, I hadn't tripped yet, but then I fell. I tried to catch myself, but when my hand connected with the floor a heard a sharp crack and then pain. I couldn't scream. I wouldn't embarrass myself, but silent tears ran down my cheeks as my wrist seared with pain. I noticed Jasper get a panicked look on his face, and the next thing I knew he was standing over me.

"What happened?" he asked urgently. Every one else stopped playing and turned their attention to us.

"My wrist!" was all I could say before Jasper had me in his arms, quickly walking me out of the gym and to the nurse's office. He muttered something under his breath that I didn't catch. The pain was getting worse and I was crying more.

"Shhh," he shushed calmly, smiling at me. "It's going to be alright." I smiled a tiny smile, it was all I could manage through the pain, but how could I not smile when I was being carried by Jasper Hale. We were in the nurse's office soon. "She fell in gym. I think she broke her wrist." Jasper said to the nurse. She gasped when he said, 'broke her wrist' and I sighed. "I could drive her to the hospital, she can call her uncle on the way." Jasper suggested. He looked to me for approval and I smiled and nodded.

"I guess that's alright, but we need to notify her cousin." the nurse said. Telling Bella about any accidents that may happen to me was one of the special conditions I had.

"I'll have my brother Edward tell her." Jasper said. The nurse nodded and with that, we were out of the office, Jasper still holding me, and to Edward's Volvo quickly.

"Where's your car?" I asked quietly, trying to keep my voice even. He set me down and opened the passenger door for me. I carefully got in, and then he got in the driver's side and put the key in the ignition. We were out of the parking lot and on the road quickly.

"I don't own a car, I usually just ride with one of my brothers. You need to call Charlie." he reminded me. I pulled my cell phone out, using my unhurt arm and dialed the number for the police station. When I was connected to Uncle Charlie, he sounded concerned.

"What's wrong?" he greeted me.

"I fell in gym and I think I broke my wrist." I said, "But don't worry," I added quickly, "I'm on my way to the hospital." As I said that, Jasper pulled into a parking space near the Emergency Room entrance. I shuddered. I hated emergency rooms. He opened my door and helped me out. Then, with his arm around my waist, we walked into the hospital together. He sat me down in a chair to wait as he went to the receptionist. A few minutes later he walked back to me.

"You are getting an X-Ray in a few minutes." he said. I did not want this. I had my fill of hospitals back in Texas and hated being here. Jasper sat beside me and put his arm around my shoulders. "Everything will be fine." he said reassuringly. It helped a lot, but the memories of being in hospitals flooded my mind and I started crying. I had my head against his chest, crying, and he was stroking my hair, telling me it will be okay and everything is fine. Someone called my name from far away and then Jasper leaned close to my ear.

"Time for your X-Ray, honey." He said. He stood up first and helped me up. He walked me to the X-Ray technician and let me go. "I'll be waiting for you." he said, kissing me on the cheek. I sighed a little and walked back to the X-Ray room. It was quick, no more than a few minutes, and I was sent into the actual hospital and sat on a bed. Jasper came in almost as soon as I was out of X-Ray, and sat with me. We just sat, not talking. He had his arm around my shoulders and I was leaning into him. I closed my eyes, and then I heard footsteps. Must be the doctor, I thought. I didn't open my eyes.

"Addison?" the doctor asked. His voice was musical, somewhat like Jasper's. I could feel Jasper tense at my side. I opened my eyes and saw a very handsome doctor, like the ones on TV, putting my X-rays on the light board above the bed. "You have broken your wrist. It will need a cast." he said. I just watched him. He eyed Jasper suspiciously and I wondered why. "We'll have that put on and you will be out of here soon." Jasper led me to the casting room, following the handsome doctor. He stood behind me, rubbing my back the whole time I was getting my cast put on. I kept looking up at him and every time I did, he was smiling at me. When everything was done, and the cast was on Jasper offered to drive me home. When we were in the car, I asked.

"Did you know that doctor?"

"That's my 'father', Carlisle." Jasper said.

"Your father?" I asked. How could someone so young be Jasper's father.

"Adoptive." was all he said. I mulled that over in my head for a little while.

"So," I started, but didn't continue.

"So what?" he asked playfully. I smiled.

"Are we talking now, or what?" I asked. His smile disappeared.

"I don't know." he said sincerely. I didn't understand why we couldn't talk to each other. I wanted to know what he was thinking, but the less rational side of me wanted to know if he liked me, and, as usual, that side took over. We were at Bella's house, her truck was parked out front, and Jasper parked next to it. Before he had time to get out, I turned in my seat so that my whole body was facing him. He turned his attention to me, so I started.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked quietly.

"You just did," he replied. I got a little angry at his unwillingness to cooperate.

"Okay, then can I ask you something else?" I asked. He must have felt my lack of patience.

"Alright." he said.

"Do you like me?" I asked, feeling foolish, my face getting hot. I turned my face away, to look out the windshield and waited for his answer. He put his cold hand on my face and turned my head to look into his eyes. They were beautiful, and honey gold.

"No." he said. I looked down, disappointed. Then he continued. "I'm in love with you, Addison." I looked up, excited. His eyes held the same emotion, but mixed with something else. Hurt? Confusion? I couldn't tell.

"I love you too, Jasper." I said, trying to keep calm. He smiled really wide. Then he lost his smile and looked serious again.

"Hold still." he said. He leaned his face toward mine, like he was going to kiss me, but then stopped. I did just as he said, and stayed absolutely still. Then his lips connected with mine. I was so happy! I smiled against his lips, and he smiled too, pulling back. I wanted more, but I couldn't be selfish, I had to take what I could get. Jasper got out of the car and walked over to my side of the car. He opened the door and walked me up to the house. I got out the key and was about to unlock the door, when Jasper turned me to face him again. He gave me another quick kiss and then let me open the door. Edward was getting up from the couch, most likely to go home, and Bella followed him. I turned to Jasper.

"I hope your wrist feels better." he said. I smiled. I had to say it again, just to hear him say it back.

"I love you, Jasper."

"I love you too, Addi." he gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before he left with Edward. I sighed and sunk to the ground right there.

"Come on." Bella said, pulling me into the house. As soon as I was inside. I collapsed on the couch. "Hey," Bella said, waving a hand in front of my face, "what's with you?" I sighed happily.

"Jasper Hale kissed me."

**JPOV**

I stared at her all through lunch, except the time that she looked at me. I wanted her to know that I still cared about her, but I couldn't do that without betraying the trust of my family. As I walked out of the cafeteria, she ran right into me. She dropped her binder, and was very nervous, even though I wasn't sure she actually knew who she ran into. I picked up the binder and handed it to her.

"Watch where you're walking." I warned. Then I walked away as fast as I could around humans and made my way to the gym. After I had changed, privately in a bathroom stall of course, I went to sit in the bleachers like any human would do. I had been trying to think about anything but Addison when she walked into the gym. She was in my gym class. Perfect. She noticed me, and instantly got nervous. I just sat, trying to look away from her, but feeling her eyes on me the entire time. This was going to be hard.

With every day it got harder not to talk to her. The way she practically threw herself on the floor to try to get my attention. I wanted to help her up, I felt a pull toward her every time, but I couldn't do it. I resisted that pull, but every day it got stronger. Edward had told me that Addison sometimes had nightmares about me drinking her blood, go figure, and I could always tell when she had had those dreams, because the day after at school, she was tense and scared. There were some days when it would get so bad, she would run out of the cafeteria crying, and Bella would run after her. I wanted to be the one running after her. Comforting her. Calming her. Then finally, my time came.

We were in gym and playing soccer. Addi was worried, most likely that she would get hurt, and she stayed mostly out of the way. Her worrying got lighter and lighter, but then some idiot ran right into her, knocking her down. Her hand shot out as a reflex to catch herself, but when her hand hit the ground, her wrist snapped. I heard it and ran over to her. This was something I could not just ignore.

"What happened?" I said worriedly, although I knew what had happened.

"My wrist!" she yelled. She was in pain. I picked her up and walked her to the nurses office at a very fast human pace. She was crying, and I wanted to calm her down, but my mind was buzzing with ways to go about this. When we were in the nurses office, I had decided I would drive Addi to the hospital. I told the nurse this and she agreed. Then I promised to tell Edward what happened and Addison and I were out of there and to Edward's car. I helped her in and the I got in and started driving quickly to the hospital.

"Where's your car?" she asked quietly. I smiled to myself. She had a broken wrist, and she was in pain, but she still tried to make small talk.

"I don't own a car. I usually just ride with one of my brothers. You need to call Charlie." I reminded her. She pulled a tiny red phone out of her pocket and dialed the number. I listened to the short conversation, and when she was finished on the phone, we were at the hospital. I felt the sudden panic hit her as we walked up to the entrance. I sat her down and told the receptionist the whole story. Then, when I went back to sit with her again, I felt the tormented sadness. I held her and she cried into me. The moment would have been romantic, but her crying made it sad. Then the X-ray technician called her and I had tell her. I didn't want to leave her, but I had to. I waited for her x-ray to be done, and it seemed to take forever. Once she was sitting on the bed in the hospital I rushed to her, needing to hold her. Then one of the worst things possible happened, Carlisle walked over to us. When he saw me he was in a state of absolute confusion. I just held my ground and acted as if it was nothing.

"Addison?" he asked, trying to get her attention. I tensed a bit at his mood. It was confusion mixed with anger. "You have broken your wrist. It will need a cast." he said in his doctor tone. "We'll have that put on and you will be out of here soon." He walked out of the room, leading us to the casting room. I held Addi through everything. She was so scared. Every time she looked at me, I smiled, just because it comforted her. Then, when we were finished, I offered to drive her home. When we were in the car, she asked about Carlisle.

"Did you know that doctor?"

"That's my 'father', Carlisle." I said.

"Your father?" she asked in disbelief.

"Adoptive." I replied. We rode in silence for a while, but Addison broke it.

"So," she started. I smiled at her.

"So what?" I asked jokingly.

"Are we talking now, or what?" She asked. I suddenly got serious again.

"I don't know." I answered honestly. I hated that I had to say that. I wanted her to stay with me, and feel safe with me, and talk to me, but I didn't know if I was 'allowed'. Her mood changed from sad, to confused, to determined in a short space of time. I could not wait to find out what the determination was for. As soon as I pulled up beside Bella's truck, Addison turned in her seat, and she was sitting on her knees facing me. I smiled a little.

"Can I ask you something?" she asked.

"You just did," I replied, smiling. She got a little angry.

"Okay, then can I ask you something else?" she asked, a clear lack of patience lacing her tone.

"Alright." I replied, bracing myself for whatever may come next.

"Do you like me?" She asked, suddenly getting very embarrassed. She looked away from me, but I wanted her to know she didn't have to feel that way around me. I turned her face to look at mine and looked into her magnificent green eyes. Then I decided how to answer.

"No." I said quietly, truthfully. She looked down, disappointment and sadness clear, but I wasn't finished. "I'm in love with you, Addison." She looked at me excitedly. I'm sure my features held the same emotion, but there was also the confusion about what my family would think. Right now though, that was not my main concern.

"I love you too, Jasper." She replied. I smiled. Then I decided my next move.

"Hold still." I commanded quietly. I leaned toward her, trying hard to keep calm. I didn't breath, and then, my lips met hers. I was very pleased with my self control. She was very obedient, she kept absolutely still. When she smiled against my lips, I pulled away. I felt an emotion I had never felt before in that moment, and I loved it. I quickly got out of the car and went to open her door. We walked up to house, and before she opened the door, I gave her another kiss. I loved the feeling. When she opened the door, I felt Edward's mood instantly. He was angry, but he hid it from Bella. Addison turned to face me, and I said the only thing I could.

"I hope your wrist feels better." She smiled.

"I love you, Jasper." she said sweetly. I smiled.

"I love you too, Addi." I gave her a small kiss on the cheek and then went to the car to face hell. Edward was already in the drivers side, most likely because he drove faster. We were home too quickly. I hesitated getting out of the car but Edward pulled open the door and pulled me out. He was _that_ angry. I followed him into the house. Their were strong feelings of anger and confusion inside. I knew what I was going to face, but I also knew that I was not prepared for it. I walked to the source of the emotions and joined my family in the living room. Emmett had his hands on Rosalie's shoulders, keeping her from attacking I was sure, but she could still talk.

"What the hell were doing?!" she shouted very angrily. I didn't answer, I just looked at Carlisle. I needed his support.

"Rosalie," he started, "we are going to discuss this calmly." He sat down, and I followed, sitting across from him. "Rosalie told me everything she knows about you and Addison." he said, and then told me everything Rosalie said. The party, Addison running into my room, me kissing her on the cheek, me telling her I couldn't be with her, me biting Edward, me ignoring her, her nightmares, her panic attacks, and me ignoring her. "Is all of this true?"

"Yes," I said quietly, in pain hearing all of this again.

"What happened today?" he asked.

"She fell in gym." I said simply, my voice almost breaking.

"What else?" he asked. He wanted to know everything, and we were not supposed to have secrets in this family so I told him everything. I emphasized on the moments Addison had felt the most pain and sadness, and how I was able to comfort her, barely using my powers. Then, the kiss. Rosalie's anger was the most prominent emotion at that point.

"That was very irresponsible." Carlisle said when I finished.

"What was I supposed to do?" I asked angrily standing up. "Just leave her until someone finally realized she had a broken wrist? Get Bella and her father unnecessarily worried? Amplify Addison's awful moods?" I sat back down and put my face in my hands. No one spoke for a while. Their emotions were changing from anger to sadness for me. All except one. Rosalie was still angry. Finally Carlisle spoke.

"I never said it was the wrong thing to do, just very irresponsible." he said, I looked at him. Was he condoning my relationship with Addi?

"No." Edward answered my thought.

"Why not?" I asked, my voice sounding strained. "You get to have Bella."

"I have more self control. And Bella doesn't self-mutilate." he said. If I wasn't more in control, I would have bit him again, and this time on purpose.

"Why do you not give me any credit?" I asked getting angry. "I do have self control." Once again, everyone was silent for a long while, and, although I knew Edward would be listening, I took the time to think. There would be school tomorrow and I would go. I had to go. I would not ignore Addison. She would sit with me at lunch, and we would walk to gym together. She probably wouldn't have to do any activities because of her wrist, so I would sit out with her and we could talk. I wasn't sure what we would talk about, but I would be there with her the entire class, and then I could walk her to her last class. Maybe I would see her after school. I could borrow Emmett's Jeep and drive her home.

"Do you think you can control yourself around Addison?" Carlisle asked, breaking my thoughts. Edward was looking at him, confused.

"Yes." I answered. I knew I could.

"I suppose you could try having a relationship with her." he said. Rosalie finally spoke up.

"What happens when she starts questioning him about how he's 'different'?" she asked.

"Addison is keeping many secrets, even from Bella. If Jasper told her, she wouldn't tell anyone." Edward answered. I could hardly believe, after all the anger, that he was defending me. Rosalie sat back, defeated. I smiled a little, trying to contain my joy. I was allowed to be with the girl I loved and I didn't have to hide it from my family. No secrets.

"Thank you." I said to Carlisle. I went to my bedroom to sit and think. I locked the door and sat on my bed. Edward went to Bella every night. I wanted to see Addi tonight, and every other night too. I needed to see her. It was only 7pm when I went into my room, so I waited until I thought it would be safe to go. I just sat and thought, about Addi.


	4. Chapter 4

**APOV**

"He did what?!" Bella asked loudly.

"He kissed me." I said again. I wondered why she was being like this. It was just a kiss.

"Oh," she said, sitting on the couch next to me. I picked up the remote and started flipping through the channels.

"What's for dinner?" I asked casually.

"I don't know. What do you want?" she asked. Oh great. The special treatment has started.

"It doesn't matter. Just make whatever you want." I said.

"I want to make something special for you." she said. I got a little angry.

"Why?" I asked, a little harshly.

"Because Jasper kissed you." she said quietly. "What did you think?"

"My wrist." I said, holding up my casted arm. "Forget it." I said quietly "Can you make cheeseburger macaroni?" I asked, smiling again.

"Sure." she said happily. She went to the kitchen to start making dinner. I just kept flipping through the channels, thinking about Jasper. He said he loved me. I said I loved him. It was like a dream come true. He wasn't like anyone else. He was more empathetic. He always knew what I was thinking, and he knew how to help. For a while I really thought he didn't want anything to do with me, but the events of the day changed my mind completely. It was like we had been keeping our feelings for each other locked away and today we could finally let them out. I smiled to myself. When Bella was almost done making dinner, Uncle Charlie walked through the door.

"Hey girls." he said, hanging up his coat and gun belt. He came over to the couch and looked at me. "How's your wrist?"

"Broken." I replied, holding it up for him to see.

"Dinner's ready." Bella called from the kitchen. We all sat down and ate in silence, like usual. When dinner was over, Bella and I went up to her bedroom to do our homework, and Uncle Charlie watched TV. I didn't have that much homework so I got ready for bed earlier. I was worn out from everything, and decided to go to bed early too. Not too early, around 9pm. Uncle Charlie had already gone to bed, so I just lied comfortably on the couch and closed my eyes. I was asleep very quickly.

Jasper was kissing me, but with more force and urgency than he had before. He moved from my lips to my neck and I was enjoying it, then I felt a tear in my throat and he started sucking. I fell limp in his arms and he dropped me, pulling away. I looked at him, same red eyes and messed up hair. Trails of deep red coming from his mouth. He grabbed me up again and started sucking my blood. "Jasper." I gasped.

I shot up on the couch out of my nightmare, and saw a person standing above me. It only took a second to register the sight in front of me and I prepared to scream. He put his hand over my mouth.

"It's alright. It's just me, Jasper." he said, sitting on the couch with his hand still over my mouth. When he removed it, I hugged his neck tightly and cried into his chest. He pulled me into his lap and stroked my hair soothingly. We sat like this for a while, and, even though I was crying, I loved it. Finally, I pulled away to look at him. He had concern in his eyes. I wiped the stray tears from my cheeks.

"Would you like to talk about it?" he asked, quietly and sweetly.

"It was just a dream." I told him, then he pulled me back to him and we sat like that for a long time. Finally, he spoke.

"I have to go." he said sadly.

"Oh," was all I could say. I couldn't beg him to stay with me.

"I'll see you at school later." he said, smiling. I looked at the clock and it was almost 5am. I smiled back.

"I love you, Jasper." I said. Then he kissed me again, but this time, it was different. This time, he parted his lips slightly and I did this same, taking his bottom lip into my mouth and sucking it gently. He gasped and pulled away so quickly it startled me.

"I'm sorry." he said, pulling me into a hug. "I love you too Addison." He kissed the top of my head, then got up to leave. I was anxious and sad, I didn't want him to leave. Then calmness swept over me. I lied back down as he walked out the door, and closed my eyes. I wasn't going back to sleep, but I wanted to save the memory of the moment that we kissed. Even though he pulled away and scared me a little, it was amazing. I smiled at the ceiling. I couldn't wait for school.

When I got up, I tried to hide my happiness. I got ready like usual and was a little unusually hyper. I was just excited to see Jasper, but I wasn't sure I could tell Bella. Thankfully, she didn't ask any questions about my mood. When we got into her truck to go to school, I got the nervous feeling of butterflies in my stomach and just smiled at it. Bella was in a happy mood too, which was good. As if she knew, she pulled into a space two cars down from the Cullen's cars and we got out. I saw Jasper, and couldn't help but run right up to him. A relaxed smile came across his face and, when I got closer, he opened his arms for me. I hugged him tight, and he kissed the top of my head. He put his arm around my shoulders and I put mine around his waist and we walked into school together.

People stared as Jasper walked me to my first class. He stopped me before I walked in the door and waited for two people to pass before he spoke.

"I'll meet you here after class." he said, kissing the top of my head.

"Love you." I said, he smiled.

"Love you too." he said, and then I walked into class. I sat in my seat and was more attentive than usual. Class seemed to be over quickly, which surprised me. When I walked out of class, Jasper walked up to me and put his arm around my shoulders kissing my head.

"How was English?" he asked as we walked to my next class.

"Okay I guess. How good can English be?" I asked, smiling.

"I suppose you're right." he said as we arrived at my next class. I sighed. "It's alright," he said, "only another hour until we can see each other again." He wrapped me in a hug, and I smiled hugging him tightly.

"See you," I said sadly, letting go of him.

"Only an hour," he reminded me.

"Only an hour," I repeated, walking through the door to my class. I sat and tried to pay attention, which was still oddly easy. Once again, class seemed to end quickly. I was the last one out of the class, but Jasper just stood there patiently, and waited for me. He walked me to my next, hugging me when we got to the door and reminding me that it was only another hour before I saw him again. This class was Trigonometry, and I had a test today. I was grateful for my new found alertness because I had barely studied for the test, so when the teacher reviewed the material a few minutes before the test, I was able to pay very close attention. I was confident that I made a good grade. That put me in an even better mood. When I met Jasper at the door I was smiling and his face lit up at the sight of mine.

"Have a good class?" he asked.

"Yep, we had a test." I said happily, he looked playfully confused.

"I didn't know that was a good thing." he said, staring at the sky. I laughed a little.

"Well, it is." I said decisively. He laughed. Then we were at the door to my History class. "Yuck," I said, eyeing the door, "History." Jasper laughed again and pulled me into a tight hug. I smiled, and hugged him back. He kissed the top of my head.

"Only an hour until lunch." he said. I smiled realizing I would have a whole fifty minutes with Jasper. I walked through the door, and was almost the last one in the class. I sat down and, even though I was anxious for class to be over and lunch to begin, I was still able to pay attention. When class was over, I practically flew out the door, and Jasper was there, waiting for me. On the way to the cafeteria, a minor few feet away from my class, I fell and Jasper caught me around the waist. He kept his arm there and we walked into the cafeteria together. He said he wasn't hungry and went to a table, leaving me to get my food. All I got was an apple and a coke. When I sat down, Jasper eyed my lunch suspiciously.

"What?" I said, taking a bit of the apple.

"Is that all you're going to eat?" he asked.

"Yeah, what about you?" I asked.

"I'm not hungry." he said, looking away.

"You never really eat." I said, it was one of my observations over the weeks that all I could do was stare. He barely touched his food at lunch, and when he did it was a little nibble of it, and then he threw it away.

"Yeah, I guess I don't." was all he said.

"Why?" I asked curiously. He didn't seem to be losing any weight, and he was muscular. I didn't understand how he could skip meals and still look like that.

"Um," he said. "Can I tell you later?" he asked.

"How much later?" I asked. It was like we were playing the questions only game.

"Later this week?" he asked, trying to get my approval.

"Fine." I said, taking another bite of my apple and then a sip of coke. I stared at him for a while, wanting to say something, but not knowing what to say. At least I got a really good chance to look at him. I studied him, then he broke the silence.

"Do you have much homework for tonight?" he asked. I smiled, hoping this conversation was going the direction I wanted it to.

"No, you?" I asked.

"Not too much." he said, smiling. "Would you like to go for a walk with me after school?" he asked. Before I was able to answer. Edward came over to the table with Bella.

"May I borrow Jasper for a minute?" he asked politely. I nodded reluctantly. He took Jasper outside of the cafeteria building and Bella sat down with me. We just stared at each other in silence until Jasper came back with Edward following him. He looked upset. Bella got up and Jasper took her place at the table. Edward and Bella exited the cafeteria and then I realized that almost everybody else was gone too.

"Come on, we're going to be late to class." he said, getting up again. I followed him and put my arm around his waist, hopefully soothing him. It didn't seem to work. Neither of us changed for Gym, me because of my broken wrist, and him because I wasn't. We sat in the bleachers, and I started running my fingers through his hair. It seemed to relax him a little.

"What happened with Edward?" I asked calmly. He put his arm around my waist and pulled me closer, leaning his head on mine. I just kept running my fingers through his dirty blond locks.

"He had a 'warning' for me." Jasper said, sarcasm pure in his voice. I giggled a little.

"Warning?" I asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Yes, but don't worry about it darlin'." he said in his slight southern drawl, moving his head to kiss the my hair. Then I noticed people were staring. I got nervous.

"Everyone's staring." I whispered quietly.

"The coach isn't in yet, do you want to leave?" he asked caringly. As much as I wanted that, if I didn't show up for class, Uncle Charlie would find out, and I would be in trouble.

"No, it's okay." I said, resuming stroking his hair. He smiled. We sat like that for awhile, the coach didn't say anything to us. We just watched the game of badminton. I was so glad I wasn't playing. I would have hurt someone. Class was almost over, but I didn't want to leave Jasper. Maybe I could just skip my last class, I thought. "Jasper?" I asked, getting his attention.

"Hm?" he replied.

"Can we end school early today?" I asked, trying to sound bored, but really just excited about our walk.

"Sure." Jasper said, standing up. Everyone was going to change into their regular clothes, so we were alone in the gym. When class was over, we walked straight out of school and to the parking lot. No one would notice. Jasper let go of me and started fishing in his school bag for something. He pulled out a piece of paper and a pen and started writing a note. He put the note in Edward's car, and then came back to me. "Let's go." he said. We walked, holding hands up a path into a largely forested area until we came to a clearing. "Tell me something Addison." he said, "What have you noticed about my appearance?"

"You have golden eyes, but sometimes they lose their color and change to black." I said. "You're skin is very cold and pale." I didn't know what else to say.

"Edward told me you had nightmares. What were they about?" he asked quietly, keeping close to me.

"You." I replied quietly.

"What did I do?" he asked.

"You...drank...blood." I stammered.

"And what creature drinks blood?" he asked, seeming like he was trying hard to keep calm.

"Vampire." I breathed. Was Jasper telling me he was a vampire?

**JPOV**

I ran to Addison later that night after Edward had left to go to Bella. He had advised me against seeing her, but I couldn't resist. I stalked silently through the front door, using the key that Edward had told me about. I sat on the coffee table in front of a very peacefully sleeping Addison. She looked so beautiful in her sleep. I smiled. Then she stirred. I thought she was waking, but then she muttered something that sounded like, 'Jasper.' Then she shot up on the couch, she looked at me and I felt the fright emanating from her in enormous waves. I put my hand over her mouth as I saw her prepare to scream.

"It's alright. It's just me, Jasper." I whispered urgently. Then I sat on the couch and took my hand off of her mouth. When I did this, she wrapped her arms around my neck and I pulled her onto my lap, stroking her hair and letting her cry. When her sad mood eased up, she pulled away and looked at me, tears staining her face. She wiped them away quickly. I had to at least try to help.

"Would you like to talk about it?" I asked quietly.

"It was just a dream." she muttered. I realized she had been having the nightmares that Edward told me about. I pulled her back to me and kept her like that for a long while. I looked at the clock and realized that her uncle would be up soon and I had to leave. I did not want to leave, but I also didn't want to be arrested or shot at.

"I have to go." I said in a sad tone. She looked up at me with sad eyes.

"Oh," was all she said.

"I'll see you at school later." I said. I couldn't say tomorrow because it was already that day. I thought it would make her smile, and it did. I smiled back.

"I love you Jasper." she whispered. There was no way I could leave without a kiss, so I leaned down to kiss her. I let go a little on this kiss and opened my mouth slightly, taking her top lip in between mine and letting her take my bottom in hers. It was a little too much, so I pulled back. I must have done this too quickly, because I startled her.

"I'm sorry," I said, hugging her. "I love you too Addison." I kissed the top of her head, and got up, slowly, to leave. She feeling very sad, and I wanted to go back and comfort her, but I heard noise coming from Charlie's room and knew that he was awake. I had to leave. I ran home thinking about that kiss. I couldn't hide it from Edward, there was no way I could stop thinking about it. I was glad to have a good memory, I would love to relive that moment over and over again. I arrived home and went straight to my bedroom to get ready for school. I took a quick cold shower, just because it gave me more time to think about Addi. Then I got dressed, walked outside and got in Edward's Volvo. Rosalie and I were not on speaking terms and Emmett stood by her, sometimes sending apologetic glances my way. I just shrugged it off. I would take Addison over Rosalie.

"That's not nice." Edward said, getting in the car. He was talking to my thoughts, sometimes it got annoying.

"She had another nightmare." I said, needing to tell someone about it. "She almost screamed when she saw me sitting there next to her." Edward smiled.

"Would you like to know what she was thinking then?" he asked slyly.

"I would rather leave it a mystery." I said as we arrived at school. I got out of the car and saw Bella's truck coming into the parking lot. She parked two cars down from Edward's car and as soon as Bella cut the engine, Addi jumped out. I could feel the happiness and excitement coming from her before she even saw me. Then I could hear the change in her heart rate as it sped up and she ran toward me. I opened my arms and wrapped them around her when she got to me. She hugged back with all of her strength and I kissed her head, smiling into her hair. She pulled away from me and I put my arm around her shoulders, she put her arm around my waist and we walked to her first class. I stopped her when we reached the door and let two people go in before I spoke.

"I'll meet you here after class." I said, looking into her amazing green eyes. Then I kissed her head.

"Love you." she said sweetly. I smiled.

"Love you too." I said, and then walked away. I walked quickly to my class and made it just in time. I took my seat next to Emmett and he raised his eyebrows at me.

"What?" I whispered.

"You gonna tell her?" he asked. I was confused at first, then I realized what he meant.

"Of course." I said, annoyed at him. He slumped in his seat, he seemed to have the easiest time fitting in with the humans. The class passed by slowly. Emmett threw some paper at me halfway through, I opened the paper to see some vulgar things written on it about Addison and me. I made a disgusted face at him and threw the paper away. He could be very immature at times. He just laughed. When class was over, I went quickly to Addi's class. She walked out and I put my arm around her shoulders.

"How was English?" I asked.

"Okay I guess. How good can English be?" she asked. I looked at her and she was smiling at me.

"I suppose you're right." I smiled. We soon arrived at the door to her next class and she sighed heavily. "It's alright," I said, wrapping my arms around her, "only another hour until we can see each other again." She hugged me back tightly and then pulled away.

"See you." she said sadly.

"Only an hour." I reminded her.

"Only an hour." she muttered back. I smiled and walked to my class. Luckily none of my family was in that one, so it was easier to pay attention. When class was over, I walked swiftly to Addison and put my arm around her shoulders again walking her to her class. I had to say 'only an hour' several times before she would let me go. I walked to my class and sighed. I never wanted to be away from Addi for too long. Class was over and I walked a little too quickly to her class. She walked out smiling. I smiled at the sight of her happy face.

"Have a good class?" I asked.

"Yep, we had a test." she replied. I put on my best fake confused face.

"I didn't know that was a good thing."I said, looking at the gray sky. She gave a little laugh at my side.

"Well, it is." she said. I had to laugh, she was giving off the best emotions. Then we arrived at her class. "Yuck," she said, "History." I laughed and wrapped my arms tightly around her, kissing the top of her head.

"Only an hour until lunch." I said. She smiled and walked into class.

I arrived late to my next class, but it didn't matter. In one hour, I would get to be with Addison for an hour, uninterrupted. I tried to tune out the teacher, and thought about what I was going to say to Addi. The bell rang, signaling the end of class and I got out of there as fast as humanly possible. When I arrived at Addison's class, she ran out to me. We just held hands on the way to the cafeteria, but then Addi tripped. I caught her around the waist and kept my arm there. We walked into the cafeteria and I told her that I wasn't hungry and I would save a table for us. She smiled and got in line to get her food. She walked back to the table with an apple and a coke. I looked at her food, wondering why someone as skinny as her wasn't eating more.

"What?" she asked, biting into the apple.

"Is that all you're going to eat?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, what about you?" she asked, gesturing with her apple to the lack of food in front of me.

"I'm not hungry." I told her, looking away.

"You never really eat." She said.

"Yeah, I guess I don't." I said, still not looking at her.

"Why?" she asked. I didn't know what to say to that. I would have liked to just been able to tell her right then and there what I was, but I knew I couldn't, not in front of all these other humans.

"Um," I said. "Can I tell you later?"

"How much later?" she asked. She really wanted to know, I could tell.

"Later this week?" I asked.

"Fine." She said, biting her apple again. She stared at me, trying to figure something out, I guessed, but it seemed as if she wasn't getting anywhere with it. I decided what I was going to do. I would take her out into the woods after school and tell her there, where we could be alone, but where my family would know where I was incase something went terribly wrong.

"Do you have much homework for tonight?" I asked. She smiled, most likely hoping I would ask her on a date.

"No, you?" she asked. I didn't, but even if I did, I would have time to do it.

"Not too much." I said, happy this was going my way. "Would you like to go for a walk with me after school?" She was about to answer when Edward walked up to the table.

"May I borrow Jasper for a minute?" he asked Addi. She nodded, a sad feeling coming to her. Edward walked me out of the cafeteria and as soon as the doors closed, he started talking, quietly and harshly.

"You can not tell her!" he said sharply.

"Yes, I can. It's my choice, and besides, you're the one who told Rosalie I could." I said, just as sharp.

"I only said that so she would leave you alone. You can not tell her." He said, enunciating every syllable.

"Yes, I can, and after school, I will." I said angrily. "Edward," I added, "this is not your decision, and if it is a mistake, it isn't your mistake either. Let me do this." I pleaded. He just walked away, back to the cafeteria. He was angry, I could feel it. It made me angry. I walked back to Addi, trying to hide my anger. I sat back down at the table, trying to look like I had before I left. It was no use. I was angry, and nothing was stopping it.

"Come on, we're going to be late to class." I said, standing up again. Addison followed me and put her arm around my waist. Still, I was angry. We both sat in the bleachers, not bothering to change. She didn't have to because her arm was broken, and I would stay with her, even if it meant me getting a low grade in Gym. When we sat down, Addi started running her fingers through my hair. It was a very good feeling and it instantly relaxed me. Then she decided to speak.

"What happened with Edward?" she asked quietly. I put my arm around her waist and put my head on hers. She just kept up the soothing movements of her fingers through my hair.

"He had a 'warning' for me." I said sarcastically. She giggled and it made me smile.

"Warning?" she asked.

"Yes, but don't worry about it darlin'." I said, kissing her hair. I didn't know why, but she suddenly got very nervous.

"Everyone's staring." She whispered. I didn't want to stop our intimate moment.

"The coach isn't in yet, do you want to leave?" I asked.

"No, it's okay." She replied bravely. I smiled as she resumed stroking my hair. We sat like this the entire class, and no one said anything. A few people were a little distracted by staring, but I sent one evil glare their way and no one looked at us for the rest of the hour. I wished she would just skip her last class and stay with me. "Jasper?" she asked.

"Hm?"

"Can we end school early today?" she asked, sounding bored, but I could feel the excitement in her. I hid my smile.

"Sure." I said, standing up. There was no one in the gym, so we walked out, hand in hand. When we reached the parking lot, and Edward's car, I stopped, letting go of Addi's hand. I reached in my school bag for a piece of paper and a pen. 'I am going to tell Addison what I am, what we are, and I am doing it now. No stopping me. Tell Bella that Addi's safe with me.' I opened Edward's car door with my spare key and put the note on his seat. Then I shut the door lightly and went back to Addi. I knew where I wanted to go. "Let's go." I said, taking her hand again. We walked up an unmarked path until we came to my favorite clearing. I stopped and let go of her hand, standing away from her just a little.

"Tell me something Addison." I started. "What have you noticed about me?"

"You have golden eyes, but sometimes they lose their color and change to black." She said. "You're skin is very cold and pale." She continued. I urged her on. "You barely ever eat." I tried to get her to say more. "I don't know what else to say." She said nervously. I decided to take this in a different direction.

"Edward told me you had nightmares. What were they about?" I asked. She was very nervous. I wouldn't use my powers now, I didn't want to dilute her reaction.

"You." She replied.

"What did I do?" I hedged.

"You…drank…blood." She stammered. I felt bad that she felt so scared, but I had to continue.

"And what creature drinks blood?" I asked, trying hard not to help her. It was tearing at me. She had to get this.

"Vampire." She breathed. A few seconds later she started shaking her head furiously. "No, no." she muttered repeatedly, then her whole body began to shake. She fell to the ground. It was so hard to determine her exact emotion. I quickly got on my knees and grabbed her, pulling her to me. To my surprise, she didn't struggle to get away. She just shook her head and sobbed against my chest. About fifteen minutes later, she pulled away.

"You are a vampire?" she half asked, half stated. I tried to smile comfortingly, and nodded. She put her head back on my chest and laid there for another few minutes.

"Is Edward?" she asked quietly.

"Yes." I said. She was already in my lap, but I tightened my grip on her. I felt like she was slipping away. She just nestled further into my chest.

"Does Bella know?" she asked, sounding like a frightened child.

"Yes." I answered.

"Are you dangerous?" she asked finally. I smiled.

"No, my family and I only drink the blood of animals. We would never harm a human." I said reassuringly. I kept my firm hold on her, never wanting to let go. She was still shaking a little. I realized she wasn't wearing a very substantial jacket. "Are you cold?" I asked. She nodded, and I let her go just enough to take off my jacket and drape it around her shoulders. It was a completely harmless movement, and, if anything, I expected her to try to get away when I let her go, but she seemed to panic and she wrapped her small arms around my waist as tightly as she could. I was surprised. She still loved me. "Would you like to know something else?" I asked, as if I were talking to a child. I wanted to be delicate with this.

"Yes," she said quietly.

"Edward, and myself have special powers." I said, a clear smirk in my voice.

"Powers?" she asked, sniffling.  
"Yes, Edward can read minds. And don't think that's all good, because it can get very annoying." I said, she breathed a laugh. I smiled.

"What's your power?" she asked.

"I can change the emotions of the people around me." I said. She looked up at me.

"Cool." She said. I laughed, and she joined. Cool. "Are you immortal?" she asked, serious again.

"Yes." I said quietly.

"When were you born?"

"1843." I said. That was my human birth year. She was silent for a moment.

"Wow," she said, "that makes you 162 years old." I laughed. I had never really thought of it that way.

"I guess it does." I said. I lightly moved her off of my lap, and put my legs out in front of me, lying down. She lied down beside me and I put my arm around her.

"How long have you lived in Forks?" she asked.

"Only a few years. We can't stay in one place for too long, people get suspicious." I said.

"Tell me about the rest of your family." She said. I started by telling her Carlisle's story. She was so fascinated by it. Then I told her about the rest of my family. Edward, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett. She had closed her eyes a little way through and I wondered if she was sleeping. Her heart rate had slowed, so I decided she had fallen asleep. I just lied there beside her, watching her sleep, and hoping that she wasn't dreaming about vampires. I had no phone with me, so I reached into her pocket very carefully and took hers out. I looked at the time and saw that it was almost 5pm. I should wake her up, I thought. I didn't want to disturb her, but I thought that if she woke while I was running with her through the woods, she would get scared. I kissed her forehead lightly, and she stirred. She opened her eyes and smiled at me.

"Hi vampire." She said. I smiled back.

"It's time for you to get home." I said quietly.

"But I didn't get to hear your story." She said defiantly. I was surprised at how well she was handling this.

"That is for another day." I said, standing up, and offering her a hand. She took it, and stood up. I steadied her, when she almost fell. "Would you like to see something else that I can do." I said.

"Sure." She replied sleepily. I pulled her onto my back.

"Wrap your legs securely around my waist and close your eyes." I demanded. She did as she was told and I ran at my favorite pace through the woods until I arrived near her house. "Are you alright?" I asked, helping her off my back.

"What the other word for heck was that?" she questioned, astonished. Other word for heck, I thought. Nice way of cursing. I smiled at her.

"That is how I run." I said, putting my hand around her waist. I walked her to her house, and spotted Edward's Volvo parked in front alongside Bella's truck. At least Charlie wasn't home yet. We were getting closer to the house when Addi stopped me.

"Wait." She said.  
"What?" I asked. She leaned up and kissed my lips lightly. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her closer to me, deepening the kiss. I loved this, I reveled in it. We were kissing, like humans do, but then I had to pull away. I pulled away slowly this time, so I wouldn't startle her. "Would you like to spend Saturday with me?" I asked, not being able to help myself. It was Thursday, and tomorrow I would hunt.

"Yes." She replied happily. I smiled at her.

"You have to go." I said, pointing to the door.

"I don't want to leave you Jasper." She said quietly, looking in my eyes.

"I will come tonight, but I won't be at school tomorrow." I said, almost equally as quiet. She became panicked.

"Why?" she asked. I pulled her into a hug and calmed her down.

"Even though I don't drink human blood, it is still the most appetizing type." I said. She pulled away, looking at me suspiciously. "What's your favorite thing to eat?" I asked.

"Ramen noodles." She replied quickly.

"How about your least favorite?" I asked.

"Carrots." She said. I smiled.

"So, for me, human blood is ramen, and animal blood is carrots. It keeps me healthy and fed, but it isn't the best." I said. She nodded.

"So I'm just ramen to you?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. I laughed, and hugged her again.

"You are so much more than that." I kissed her head and let her go. She ran to her house, turning to me before she opened the door. I winked, and mouthed 'I love you.' She smiled and blew me a kiss, then she opened the door. Edward ran out and got in his car, and I followed him, nervous about his reaction to everything I had just told Addi


	5. Chapter 5

**APOV**

He was telling me he was a vampire.

"No, no." I said over and over again, shaking my head. How could he be a vampire? I knew the answer to that question. I knew that everything about him was different and I knew that when I fell in love with him, but for some reason, this upset me. I was shaking from head to toe, and I fell to my knees. Jasper was next to me in a second, pulling me into his lap. I kept shaking and started to sob. I wanted him to hold me like that forever, in this one moment, I felt like there were no barriers between us. I felt so close to him. When I was able to control my sobs, I pulled away to look him in the eyes.

"You are a vampire?" I said, wanting to state it completely, but not able to help the upward inflection of a question. He smiled a little, and nodded. I laid my head back on his chest and stayed there, thinking about Jasper. Then something occurred to me.

"Is Edward?" I asked.

"Yes," he replied quietly. He held me tighter and I snuggled closer to him.

"Does Bella know?" I asked, feeling foolish for sounding like a child, but not able to help it.

"Yes," he said again. Then I remembered that vampires drank human blood. Jasper didn't seem evil, but I had to ask.

"Are you dangerous?" I asked very quietly, worrying about the answer.

"No, my family and I only drink the blood of animals. We would never harm a human." he said sweetly. "Are you cold?" he asked. I hadn't realized it, but I was still shaking. I nodded and Jasper let go of me to take off his jacket and give it to me. When he let go of me I panicked, feeling like we were losing our connection. I wrapped my arms around his waist with all the strength I had. After he put his jacket over my shoulders he spoke. "Would you like to know something else?"

"Yes," I replied.

"Edward and I have special powers." he said, sounding proud. I smiled.

"Powers?" I asked.

"Yes, Edward can read minds. And don't think that's all good, because it can get very annoying." he said. I laughed a little.

"What's your power?" I asked, curious.

"I can change the emotions of the people around me." he said. I looked at him. That explained why he could calm me down so well. I couldn't think of anything to say to that, so I said the first things that came to mind.

"Cool." I felt like an idiot for saying that. He laughed and I couldn't help but laugh too. Then I thought of another question. "Are you immortal?" I asked seriously.

"Yes." he said. I wondered how old he was.

"When were you born?" I asked.

"1843." he replied. I did the math in my head and came up with his age.

"Wow that makes you 162 years old." I said, he laughed so I knew I was right. I smiled.

"I guess it does." he said. He moved me off his lap and lied down, laying me down next to him. He put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close.

"How long have you lived in Forks?" I asked.

"Only a few years. We can't stay in one place for too long, people get suspicious." he said.

"Tell me about the rest of your family." I said, making myself more comfortable. He started by telling me about his 'father' Carlisle. Then Edward, his 'mother' Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett. I fell asleep as he was talking about Rosalie and Emmett. I dreamed about Jasper, but this time, it wasn't a nightmare. We were in the clearing and he was beckoning for me to come to him. I walked very slowly toward him, and he picked me up, twirling me in the air, and then kissing my lips sweetly. Then I felt cold lips on my forehead, and woke up.

"Hi vampire." I said, smiling at him. He smiled back.

"You have to get home." he said.

"But I didn't get to hear your story." I said stubbornly.

"That is for another day." he said as he stood up, offering a hand to help me. I took it and was pulled to my feet. "Would you like to see something else that I can do?" he asked.

"Sure." I said, still partly asleep. He pulled me up on his back.

"Wrap your legs securely around my waist and close your eyes." he said. I did what he said, and then I felt air rushing past me at a very fast pace. I wanted to open my eyes, but I was scared to. Then he stopped. I opened my eyes and he helped me off his back. I recognized the woods we were in as the ones by Uncle Charlie's house. "Are you alright?" he asked.

"What the other word for heck was that?" I asked, shocked. I didn't like cussing.

"That is how I run." he said, smiling at me. He put his arm around my waist and walked me closer to my house. Before we got too close, I made him stop.

"Wait."

"What?" he asked. I leaned up and pushed my lips to his. He kissed me like he did last time, except, instead of pulling away; he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. It was an amazing kiss. He slowly broke the kiss, loosening his grip on me. "Would you like to spend the day with me Saturday?" he asked.

"Yes." I replied, smiling. How could I say no to that? He smiled back at me.

"You have to go." he said, pointing to the door.

"I don't want to leave you Jasper." I said sincerely, looking into his breathtaking gold eyes.

"I will come tonight, but I won't be at school tomorrow." he said. I got nervous.

"Why?" I said in a scared voice. He hugged me and I got calm.

"I have to hunt, so I'm not thirsty. Even though I don't drink human blood, it is still the most appetizing type." he said. I pulled away and looked him questioningly. I didn't understand. "What's your favorite thing to eat?" he asked.

"Ramen noodles." I said, not even having to think.

"How about your least favorite?" he asked. I wasn't fond of almost every vegetable, but I just picked one.

"Carrots." I said.

"So, for me, human blood is ramen, and animal blood is carrots. It keeps me healthy and fed, but it isn't the best." he said. I thought about that for a moment. I was ramen to him.

"So, I'm just ramen to you?" I asked. He laughed and pulled me into a tight hug.

"You are so much more than that." He kissed my hair and let me go. I went to the door slowly, not wanting to leave him and turned before I opened it. He winked at me and mouthed 'I love you'. I smiled and blew him a kiss, and then I opened the door. Edward flew past me the second it was open and got to his car. He must have known that Jasper told me, because he was moving at a super human speed. A vampire speed. Jasper walked to the car at a human pace and I watched him. He seemed scared to get in the car. Then I felt a hand on the back of my hoodie pull me into the house. Bella pulled me to the living room and practically pushed me into the couch.

"What?" I said, annoyed.

"What did Jasper tell you?" she said urgently.

"He told me that he was a vampire, and about Edward and the rest of his family." I said. She sat next to me.

"Why were you gone for so long?" she asked, seeming worried.

"Jasper and I were talking and I fell asleep." I said.

"Oh, so you're okay with him being a vampire?" Bella asked, whispering the last word.

"Yeah, I love him and it doesn't matter what he is. He said he isn't dangerous." I replied. She was okay with Edward being one, obviously.

"I guess." was all she said. "What do you want for dinner?"

"Ramen." I said without thinking. I blushed and Bella laughed, not knowing why I was blushing.

"Okay." she went to the kitchen, and I turned on the TV. Charlie walked through the door a short while later, and dinner was ready. We all sat down together to eat.

"How was your day?" Charlie asked me. I had to think for a second, so I wouldn't blurt out the way my day really was.

"Normal. Okay." I said in a bored tone. It was pretty good for faking.

"That's good. How bout you Bella?" he asked her.

"Yep, same as Addi. Normal." she said, kicking my foot. I just smiled at her. Charlie just kept eating. It was a little funny that he was so oblivious. I just kept eating like normal, and when I was finished, I went to Bella's room to start my homework. I barely had any. It only took about an hour to finish, but by then it was 8pm. I got ready for bed and tried to drag that out as long as it would last. I made it take an hour, but that's just because I washed my hair, and dried it. I went downstairs and got myself settled on the couch. Charlie was already in his bedroom for the night, and Bella was in hers. I turned on the TV and waited for Jasper.

It had been three hours and I wondered where he was. I just kept watching the TV on mute and almost falling asleep multiple times. Then around 1am, Jasper came. He looked at me caringly when he sat on the coffee table, taking the remote from my hands and turning off the TV.

"Have you been waiting up for me?" he asked, taking my face in his hands. I just nodded. He leaned down and kissed my lips very softly. "I'm here. Sleep now." he said soothingly. Before I knew it, I was asleep. It was a peaceful, dreamless sleep. I woke up and saw Jasper sitting on the floor, his face level with mine.

"What time is it?" I whispered.

"Four thirty." he said. "What were you dreaming about?"

"Nothing." I said, closing my eyes.

"Oh, what do you like to do for fun?" he asked randomly. I had to think. I used to play basketball in Texas. I was okay, not bad, but not good either.

"Basketball." I whispered. He was quiet.

"Do you think you can play with a broken wrist?" he asked. I looked at him.

"I think I can try. Is that what we're doing Saturday?" I asked.

"Yes ma'am." he said. I smiled. Playing basketball with Jasper. I fell asleep again, not dreaming of anything, but wishing I was dreaming of Jasper. I woke up alone, sadly. The day started slow and dragged even more as it went on. By the time lunch came, I felt like it should be Saturday already. Gym was sad; I just sat alone on the bleachers watching everyone play basketball. That made everything worse. When I got home, I did homework while Bella cooked dinner. I ate, and then I decided to get ready for bed, even though it was still early. I was ready to sleep by 9pm and Bella and Uncle Charlie left me alone to. I dreamed about being hit with basketballs. I woke up somewhat violently when I felt someone touch my face.

"I'm sorry. Did I scare you?" Jasper's voice said from next to me. I saw his face, he looked worried, and pulled his face to mine for a kiss. It was a quick kiss, but it was satisfying.

"I didn't know you were coming tonight." I said, smiling.

"It's almost 5." he said. I looked up at the clock, and he was right.

"Wow," I breathed. I didn't know I could sleep that much.

"What were you dreaming about?" he asked caringly.

"Basketball." I said simply. I wouldn't mention that I was being hit with them. He smiled.

"Go back to sleep, I'll be back to pick you up around 7:30." he said, kissing my forehead.

"Will you stay until I fall asleep?" I said. He smiled and nodded. I closed my eyes and lied back. I was asleep soon, and it was dreamless. It seemed like Jasper made me have dreamless sleep, which was good because the only dreams I have are nightmares. I woke up at 7am, and got ready quickly. Bella was up soon. Charlie had already left to go fishing. At exactly 7:30 there was a knock on the door and I opened it to see Jasper, looking happy. I hugged him, and he kissed my hair.

"Good morning." he said. I just smiled. I walked out of the house to see Edward's Volvo parked in front. "He lent it to me for today." Jasper said, catching my curious look. I got in and Jasper drove quickly to Forks High. He got out and went quickly to my door. He politely helped me out and put his arm around my waist as we walked to the gym.

"I didn't know Forks High had an open gym." I said.

"They don't." Jasper said. He pulled out a key, and unlocked the door. "Let's just say I borrowed this key for today." he said, putting it back in his pocket. I smiled and we walked in together. There were already some basketballs out, and he picked one up and made a shot from half court, that went into the basket perfectly.

"Oh my God." I said. I'd never seen anyone do that before.

"Want to see something more impressive?" he asked. I nodded and he ran to the end of the court. He turned around, and aimed his ball for the opposite basket. He shot, and it went in. It was amazing. I just stood there astonished. "What would you like to play? One on one?" he asked smiling.

"No thanks," I said.

"How about a game of horse?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Alright, but go easy on me." I said, he tossed me the ball, and I barely caught it. He smiled.

"You make the first shot." he said. I went to the free throw line and shot, making it in the basket. I shoved the ball into his chest playfully and he shot, purposely missing.

"I didn't mean you had to be bad." I said, he laughed.

"H." he said, passing me the ball. I went to a spot a little further away and shot, missing it. This time when he shot, he didn't even make it near the backboard. I laughed. He passed me the ball, and I went to a spot much closer that no one could miss at. I shot and made it. He made this one. This went on for a while. He missed some that I made and finally, we both had H-O-R-S. He stood very close to me as I prepared to make my shot, and as I put my arms up to shoot, he started tickling me. He tickled me all the way to the ground.

"That's cheating." I said in between laughs. I started rolling around to try to avoid the tickling when he suddenly stopped. I looked at him and followed his eyes to my wrist. My sleeve had rolled up, and he saw the scars from the cuts I had been making over the past few weeks. We were both silent for a long while, just staring at my wrist. Finally Jasper spoke.

"What...?" he said, trailing off. He opened his mouth again, but said nothing. I was still somewhat trapped underneath him, but I moved my arm just enough then to pull my sleeve back down. He moved, sitting on the ground and I stood up and started walking away.

"It's nothing." I said, not looking at him.

"No." he said, suddenly behind me. "It isn't nothing. Why did you do that?" he asked.

"I don't know." I answered. I did know, but I couldn't tell him.

"Yes, you do." he said. I turned around to face him. "Please, tell me." In that moment, memories of Jasper ignoring me, the nightmares, and the hurt those things caused flooded into my mind, and I started to cry. Jasper guided me to the bleachers, and we sat down together. He held me while I cried.

"I can't tell you." I said through sobs.

"Of course you can. You can tell me anything." he said soothingly.

"You won't get mad?" I asked quietly.

"Of course not." he said.

"You." I said quietly. "You ignoring me. And the horrible dreams."

"I'm so sorry." he said, sounding pained. I looked into his eyes and they held the same pain as his voice. I knew I shouldn't have told him. I put my head on his shoulder and he rubbed my back soothingly. "You have me now, you don't need to do that anymore." he said. I looked at him again and he smiled.

"I won't." I said, smiling at him. He kissed my lips lightly and when he pulled back he didn't look pained anymore.

"Would you like to go home?" he asked quietly.

"No, I want to be with you." I said. We both looked at the clock on the wall and it read 9:15am.

"What are we going to do?" he asked. I had no idea what there was to do in Forks.

"I don't know. The only places I've been here are Bella's house, school, and your house." I said. He looked lost in thought for a moment and then he spoke.

"Would you like me to take you to Seattle?" he asked.

"Yes." I said. He smiled at me and stood up, helping me up. He walked me to Edward's car, and drove me back to my house so I could tell Bella what I was doing. I unlocked the door and walked in.

"Bella?" I called.

"In the kitchen." she answered. I walked in to see her reading at the table.

"Jasper wants to take me to Seattle. Can I go?" I asked, feeling stupid for having to ask my cousin, who was the same age as me, if I could go on a date.

"Yeah." she said. "Be careful."

"Sure, sure." I said, walking out the door. Jasper was waiting in the car, and I eagerly got in.

"Now," he said, starting the car, "would you like me to drive at human speed, or vampire speed?" he said, a smile spreading across his face.

"Vampire!" I said happily. He pulled into the street and sped off, taking the car at a very fast speed. It frightened me a little, but he had amazing control of it. We drove for a while in silence, and then my stomach growled. I was embarrassed and felt my face get hot. Jasper laughed.

"Hungry?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said, still embarrassed.

"What would you like to eat?" he asked.

"Pizza." I said quickly. I knew what I was hungry for. Jasper smiled.

"I know where to take you. We're almost there." he said. I was surprised. We had only been driving for about half an hour, and we were already in Seattle. Jasper pulled into parking space in front of a restaurant called Palermo Pizza & Pasta. He got out and walked at a human speed to my door and opened it. I got out and he lightly closed the door. He put his arm around my shoulders and I put mine around his waist as we walked to the doors. He opened it with his right hand and we walked in. It was a nice place. We were seated, and handed two menus. I looked through the menu and saw what I wanted.

"I want a Classico Meat pizza, and Cheese Ravioli." I said. Jasper looked surprised.

"Alright, anything else?" he asked. I smiled.

"Diet Coke." I said. At just the right time, a hostess walked by to get our order.

"Do you know what you want to order?" she said. I nodded to Jasper, and he ordered for me.

"Classico Meat pizza and a Cheese Ravioli, and two Diet Cokes." he said, winking at me. I smiled.

"Is that all?" she said. Jasper nodded and she walked away.

"Two cokes?" I questioned. He chuckled.

"I have to keep up the human charade." he said quietly. I laughed. "What's your favorite type of music?" he asked suddenly.

"I like a lot of different kinds." I answered. Just then the hostess brought us our Cokes. I sipped mine greedily, I was very thirsty.

"What are some of your favorite bands?" he asked.

"I like Paramore," I said, that was all I could think of.

"They're pretty good." he said.

"You've heard of them?" I questioned. It was a stupid question, but I just blurted it out.

"Yes, I may be old, but I still keep up with current things." he said, smiling.

"Oh, yeah." I said, a little embarrassed. I had my hand on the table and Jasper put his hand on top of it, holding my hand across the table. I smiled.

"What are some of your favorite movies?" he asked.

"Pirates of the Caribbean, Harry Potter 3 and 4." I said. Once again, all I could think of.

"Hm," he said, contemplating. "Harry Potter." he muttered, laughing.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said, then my food arrived. I ate a slice of pizza first, and it was delicious. I had two pieces and then I looked at Jasper, who was watching me with a small amount of fascination. I picked up a third piece and started eating. He just watched.

"Aren't you going to have some?" I asked. "You know, keep up the charade?" he smiled and picked up a piece, biting off a tiny bit. "Oh come on," I said, "you can do better than that." he took a bite that was just a tiny bit bigger and I rolled my eyes. He laughed and I just ate my pizza. I started on the ravioli, and noticed Jasper looking around the restaurant. I had almost finished the ravioli, when I put one on my fork, pulled the fork back and shot the ravioli at him. It hit him right on the cheek, and he turned, looking at me with surprise on his face. He picked up a napkin and wiped his face. By then I was laughing hysterically.

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist." I said through laughs. Jasper started laughing too. Then the waitress put our bill on the table. Jasper paid it and then we left, hand in hand.

"I can not believe you threw food at me." Jasper said, smiling. I just started laughing again.

"The look on your face when I did it was priceless. I should've taken a picture." I said, then something occurred to me. "Wait," I said as we were getting in the car, "can I take pictures of you, like, do you have a reflection?" Jasper laughed a little.

"Yes Addi, I have a reflection." he said, pulling out of the parking space. "Would you like to go shopping?" he asked.

"Yes," I said, "but I don't have any money with me." He smiled.

"I have enough. You don't need to spend anything." he said. I smiled. We rode the short way in silence, only short because Jasper drove so fast, and were at the Northgate Mall in minutes. Jasper parked and got out to open my door. I got out and then we walked together into the mall. We spent a long time there, me trying on clothes, and buying some and making Jasper try on what I thought he would look good in. I actually made him buy some things. He asked me a lot more questions about things I liked, and didn't like. I wished I could have asked him questions, but I knew I couldn't, especially because we were in public. I could feel my phone buzz in my pocket, and so I took out my phone. Bella was calling me.

"Hey Bella." I said.

"Hey, are you still in Seattle?" she asked.

"Yeah, why?" I asked.

"It's getting kind of late. You should come back now." she said. I was too lazy to just take the phone away from my face so I asked what time it was. "Almost 6." Bella answered.

"Oh," I said, as Jasper walked out of the fitting rooms with the armful of clothes I made him take in there.

"Who are you talking to?" he asked.

"Bella." I mouthed.

"So, are you guys coming home now?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, see you soon." I said. Bella hung up, and I put away my phone. Before Jasper could walk away, I grabbed his arm, and placed it around my waist. We standing next to a mirror and I had to see it. There it was, his reflection. He smiled, knowing what I was testing, and leaned down to kiss my cheek. I turned my head at just the right time to make him kiss my lips and he did, smiling when he pulled back. "Bella says we have to go home." I said, pouting.

"It's probably a good idea. You don't want your uncle asking questions." he said.

"I guess," I said quietly. "Are you buying any of that?" I said, pointing to the clothes he was still holding.

"Would you like me to?" he asked. I looked at the clothes and pulled out a pair of dark blue jeans and a gray shirt with long sleeves.  
"These." I said, holding them up to him. He took them, and I took the other clothes, putting them back where they belonged. I went quickly to meet him at the register as he was paying for the clothes.

"Can I get something to eat?" I asked, as we walked out of the store.

"As long as you promise not to throw it at me." Jasper said, smiling. I started laughing and he joined. We went to the food court and I got ice cream. Jasper, jokingly got about 15 napkins. I laughed as we sat down for me to eat. I ate quickly, getting brain freeze a few times, and every time I did Jasper laughed. When I finished, it was 6:15.

"Do we have to go?" I asked, as we walked out of the mall. Jasper smiled.

"Yes, but I can guarantee you will see me tomorrow." he said. I smiled, but I was still a little sad that I had to leave Jasper. As we were driving home he turned on the radio to a classical station.

"Do you like this?" he asked. I nodded. I had always liked classical music. Jasper took one hand off the wheel and put it on mine. We held hands the rest of the way home. We were approaching Bella's house, and I couldn't help but groan. Jasper smiled.  
"It's alright." he said, as he pulled up in front of the house.

"I don't want to leave you." I said, feeling tears come to my eyes. Jasper chuckled slightly at my mood. Then tears started to fall. Jasper reached up and brushed them off my cheeks with the back of his hand. I looked into his eyes, and he stared into mine. Without thinking, I grabbed his face and pulled it to mine, kissing him fiercely. He kissed back with the same intensity and opened his mouth a little bit. I opened mine and took the opportunity to deepen the kiss. I traced the tip of my tongue over his bottom lip and he gasped slightly, but didn't pull back. I darted my tongue into his mouth and he copied my actions, his tongue meeting mine. We were kissing intensely like this for a while, when he pulled back. He was smiling widely, and I couldn't help but smile too. He got out of the car, and went to open my door, then he walked me up to the house. I opened the door, and gave Jasper a lingering hug before I went inside.

"I love you." I said.

"I love you too." he said, then he let me go and I went inside.

**JPOV**

"How much did you tell her?" he said, driving quickly home.

"Everything." I said, it was true, I had told her everything except my story.

"Why?" he spat angrily.

"Why not?" I retorted. "She deserves to know who she's in love with!"

"Maybe she shouldn't be in love with you." he said, putting a heavy emphasis on 'in love'.

"You can't help who you are in love with." I said, rolling my eyes.

"Bella and I have nothing to do with this!" he shouted, reading my thoughts.

"And why not?!" I shouted back. "It's the same thing!" We were home now, and sitting in the car in front of the house.

"It is not the same thing by any standard! You are not me! Addison is not Bella!" he shouted. Rosalie and Carlisle had run out of the house, most likely being able to hear our argument from inside. We just ignored them.

"It is the same thing! You are a vampire! I am a vampire." I said, waving my arms wildly between us. "Addison and Bella are both humans!"

"No!" Edward yelled, throwing his hands in the hair. "You and I have completely different pasts! As do Bella and Addi!"

"That doesn't make any difference! I am in control!" I shouted. Carlisle and Rose were just standing there, staring. Edward got out of the car and slammed the door with such force, he broke it off the hinges. I closed mine hard, but not that hard. Edward yelled, and kicked the car. He had such a bad temper. He heard that and he flew at me, but Carlisle held him back.

"Edward," he said, struggling against Edward, "think about what you are about to do." Edward calmed himself, and went into the house.

"What the hell happened?" Rosalie shouted. Carlisle looked at her.

"Rosalie, inside." he said. She followed his orders and went in the house.

"I told Addison, everything." I said quietly to Carlisle.

"You really love her." he said, looking at me.

"Yes. And she loves me, even though she knows." I said, still talking quietly. "She took it rather well."

"I thought she would." Carlisle replied.

"I need to hunt tomorrow, Addison and I are spending Saturday together." I said.

"Are you sure about that?" Carlisle asked. He didn't think I could handle being around Addi for that long, I guessed.

"Yes, Carlisle. Why do you all underestimate my self control?" I asked, walking away, into the house.

"I think we need to talk about this." he said, following me.

"Talk about what?" I asked, a little angrily.

"You and Addison spending the day together." he said. I did not want to have to discuss this. It was a date, like any other normal date.

"Why?" I asked.

"Well," Carlisle started, "what are the two of you going to be doing?"

"I don't know. I'll ask her tonight." I said. I was about to go to my bedroom when Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder, stopping me. He looked nervous, and he was embarrassed, I could feel it.

"Do you plan to," he hesitated, "kiss her?" he asked. I groaned.

"Carlisle, you know I have kissed Addison before." I said. "I have _really_ kissed her."

"Just don't get too caught up in the moment." he said, before letting me go to my room. I got out my laptop and looked up self control on Google. There were some strange results, but I did find some potentially useful techniques for maintaining self control during stressful situations, and, as much as I enjoyed it, kissing Addison was a somewhat stressful situation. I had been looking up more of the techniques for a few hours when I heard Carlisle call my name from the living room. I went quickly there and saw Rosalie, looking expectant, sitting on the couch.

"Rosalie would like to talk to you," Carlisle said, looking at me.

"About what?" I asked, as nicely as possible, only to Carlisle.

"Addison." Carlisle said. "Can I leave the two of you alone?" he asked condescendingly. I nodded, and so did she. We were alone in the room, facing each other.

"Speak," I said to her, disdainfully. She scowled.

"What are your plans for Saturday?" she asked.

"Spend the entire day with Addison." I said, emphasizing the word entire. She rolled her eyes.

"What do you plan to do with her?" she asked.

"Whatever she wants." I said, smiling. Rosalie groaned. "Honestly Rosalie, what do you think I'm going to do?"

"Loose your control and kill her, thus ruining our life here in Forks." she said, exasperated.

"Why would I do that?" I asked through my teeth.

"Because she kisses you and you will loose all control." she said.

"Right," I said, "I have kissed her." I said.

"Not the way she wants you to." she said.

"Edward?" I questioned angrily.

"Yes, he said that Addison wants to go much farther with you." she said. I had to hide the smile that was threatening to spread across my face.

"I will be prepared." I said, about to leave the room.

"Be careful, and keep your thoughts on control, and not Addison's blood." she said. I growled at her and left the room. By then it was almost 1am. I quickly left to go see Addi. When I went into her house, she was awake, watching television. I walked over and gently took the remote from her hands.

"Have you been waiting up for me?" I asked softly. She nodded, and I smiled, kissing her lips softly. "I'm here, sleep now." I said. She was asleep very soon after that, and I just sat, watching her sleep. She was so beautiful. She didn't move, or make any noise, so I guessed she wasn't dreaming. She woke up a few hours later.

"What time is it?" she asked.

"Four thirty." I replied, not even looking at a clock. "What were you dreaming about?"

"Nothing," she said, closing her eyes again. I smiled. Then it occurred to me that I needed to ask her about Saturday.

"What do you like to do for fun?" I asked. It took her a few seconds to answer.

"Basketball." she said.

"Do you think you can play with a broken wrist?" I asked. She opened her eyes and looked at me.

"I think I can try. Is that what we're doing Saturday?" she asked quietly.

"Yes ma'am." I replied. She closed her eyes again, and fell asleep. I didn't want to leave her, but I had to once again. I quietly slid out the door and ran home. When I got home it was 5am and I was ready to hunt. I hunted like usual on Friday, and when I was done, I wanted to go see Addison, but I couldn't. I had to wait until later. I just waited for it to be 11pm, because I knew that time was safe. When 11 finally came around, I ran out and to Addison as fast as I could. I slipped quietly through the door and went to the couch were she was sleeping. She slept peacefully for hours, until finally she started moving around. I put one hand on her cheek to calm her, but she woke up.

"I'm sorry. Did I scare you?" I asked. I was worried that I had, and when she looked at me, she pulled my face to hers and kissed my lips sweetly.

"I didn't know you were coming tonight." she replied, smiling. She always asked what time it was, so this time I answered her before she asked.

"It's almost 5." I said. She moved her head a little so she could see the clock.

"Wow," she whispered.

"What were you dreaming about?" I asked, a little worried for the answer.

"Basketball." she said. I wondered what could be so bad about basketball, but I didn't ask.

"Go back to sleep. I'll be here to pick you up around 7:30." I said, standing up and kissing her forehead.

"Will you stay until I fall asleep?" she asked nervously. I smiled and nodded, sitting back down. She closed her eyes, and I watched her fall into a deep sleep. I left soon after, and ran back home. When I got there, I changed my clothes, and then headed to the garage to see which car I could take. Edward's Volvo was fixed, and I took the keys off a hook and walked to it. When I opened the door, I noticed a note on the seat. I picked it up and opened it. 'Door fixed by Emmett. Oh, and Jasper, have fun.' I rolled my eyes, and got in the car. I drove quickly to Addison's house, and waited in front of the house until 7:30. When the time finally came, I walked up to the door, and knocked lightly. She opened the door, and then wrapped her arms around my waist in a hug. I hugged her back and kissed the top of her head.

"Good morning." I said when she pulled back. She just smiled at me. She walked out of the house and looked curiously at Edward's Volvo. "He lent it to me for today." I said. She got in and I followed, driving us quickly to Forks High. I got out and politely opened her door for her. Then I wrapped my arm around her waist as we walked up to the gym.

"I didn't know Forks High had an open gym." she said. I smiled.

"They don't." I said, producing the key Emmett had stolen for me. I unlocked the door and turned back to her. "Let's just say I borrowed this key for today." I said, putting the key back in my pocket. She smiled and we walked in together. The basketballs were already out, and I picked up one, and made a perfect shot from half court. Addison gasped.

"Oh my God." she said. I smiled at her. I ran to get the ball, and then turned back to her.

"Want to see something more impressive?" I asked. She nodded so I ran to the opposite end of the gym, turned around, and made another perfect shot. She looked awestruck. "What would you like to play?" I asked, tossing the ball between my hands. "One on one?"

"No thanks." she said.

"How about a game of horse?" I suggested. She smiled.

"Alright, but go easy on me." she said, losing her smile. I tossed the ball to her and she barely caught it. I smiled.

"You make the first shot." I said. She went to the free throw line and shot, making it. The ball bounced back to her, and she shoved it at me. I smiled. I made a horrible shot that hit the backboard and then came back to me.

"I didn't mean you had to be bad." she said. I laughed. She hadn't seen my bad yet.

"H." I said, giving her the ball. She went outside the three point line, and shot, missing it just barely. Now, I would show her how bad I could be. I got the ball from her, and shot, missing the basket completely, and hitting the exit sign above the door. This same kind of thing went on for a while, until Addi was about to make her last shot. I stood very close to her, and, as she raised her arms to shoot, I couldn't resist the urge to tickle her.

"That's cheating!" she laughed. I tickled her to the ground, and she started trying to get away from my hands. Then I spotted something on her arm, and halted my movements. I just stared at her wrist stupidly. Red scars littered her pale flesh. Why would she do this to herself?

"What...?" I asked, not finishing the sentence, not knowing what to say. She wiggled a little underneath me to pull down her sleeve, covering the scars. I moved to sit down on the floor next to her. Addi stood up and started walking away from me.

"It's nothing." she said. I ran to her.

"No," I said, "it isn't nothing. Why did you do that?" I asked, concerned.

"I don't know." she said. She was lying.

"Yes you do." I said. She turned to face me. "Please tell me." A feeling of hurt and sadness took her over, and she started crying. I walked her to the bleachers and we sat down, I held her while she cried.

"I can't tell you." she said, still crying.

"Of course you can." I said, trying to calm her. "You can tell me anything." She stopped crying, but didn't look at me.

"You won't get mad?" she asked.

"Of course not." I said.

"You." she said. "You ignoring me. And the horrible dreams." I felt so bad. I made her feel this pain. I made her cut her wrists.

"I'm so sorry." I said. She looked into my eyes, and her mood turned worse. She put her head on my shoulder, and I rubbed her back. "You have me now, you don't need to do that anymore." I said quietly. She looked at me, and I smiled.

"I won't." she said, smiling back. I kissed her, and all of the pain melted with that kiss.

"Would you like to go home?" I asked, when I pulled back.

"No, I want to be with you." she said sweetly. I looked at the clock and saw that it was only 9:15.

"What are we going to do?" I asked. I had something in mind, but I wasn't sure what she wanted to do.

"I don't know. The only places I've been here are Bella's house, school, and your house." she said. Then I knew what we would do.

"Would you like me to take you to Seattle?" I asked.

"Yes," she said happily. I stood up and helped her up, and we walked to Edward's car. I drove her to her house so that she could tell Bella our plans. I waited in the car as she went into the house. She came back a very small bit annoyed and when she got in the car, I calmed her down quickly.

"Now," I said, looking at her, "would you like me to drive at human speed, or vampire speed?" I asked, smiling widely.

"Vampire!" she said excitedly. I pulled into the street and sped down the road. We rode in silence most of the way until I heard Addi's stomach growl loudly. I looked at her, and she looked embarrassed. I laughed.

"Hungry?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said.

"What would you like to eat?" I asked.

"Pizza." she said quickly. I smiled.

"I know where to take you. We're almost there." I said. I pulled into a parking space in front of Palermo Pizza & Pasta. I got out and walked to Addi's side of the car, opening her door. I helped her out and walked with her to the restaurant. We were seated, and given menus to look through. I just pretended to read mine, while Addi picked with she wanted.

"I want a Classico Meat pizza, and Cheese Ravioli." she said to me. I was surprised that someone that small would be able to eat that much.

"Alright, anything else?" I asked. She smiled.

"Diet Coke." she said. Then, a hostess came to our table to take our order.

"Do you know what you want to order?" she said. Addi looked at me, wanting me to order for her.

"Classico Meat pizza and a Cheese Ravioli, and two Diet Cokes." I said, winking at me when I ordered the two Cokes. She smiled.

"Is that all?" the hostess said. I nodded, and she walked away.

"Two cokes?" Addi asked, raising an eyebrow. I laughed

"I have to keep up the human charade." I said. Then she laughed. I decided that this would be a good time to get to know some details about her so I asked, "What's your favorite type of music?"

"I like a lot of different kinds." she answered. Then the hostess brought us our Cokes. She drank hers, but I just let mine sit.

"What are some of your favorite bands?" I asked.

"I like Paramore," she said.

"They're pretty good." I said.

"You've heard of them?" she asked, instantly becoming embarrassed.

"Yes, I may be old, but I still keep up with current things." I said, smiling.

"Oh, yeah." she said, still embarrassed. Her hand was sitting on the table and I put my hand over it so that we were holding hands. I loved it, and she smiled.

"What are some of your favorite movies?" I asked.

"Pirates of the Caribbean, Harry Potter 3 and 4." she said.

"Hm," I said, thinking about her choice in movies. "Harry Potter." I said, laughing. Harry Potter.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing." I said, then her food arrived at the table. I watched her enjoy two pieces of pizza and then she stopped eating and looked up at me. She slowly picked up a third piece and put it to her mouth. Before she took a bite, she spoke.

"Aren't you going to have some?" she asked, motioning to the pizza. "You know, keep up the charade?" I smiled and picked up a piece, taking a small bite. "Oh come on," she said, "you can do better than that." I took a bigger bite and she rolled her eyes. I laughed and watched her eat the rest of her piece of pizza. I started looking around the restaurant when I felt something hit my face. I turned to see Addison laughing, and I wiped my face. She had thrown food at me. I laughed a little.

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist." she said in gasps through her laughter. The waitress put our bill on the table, she was annoyed. I put money in the leather sleeve and we walked out holding hands.

"I can not believe you threw food at me." I said, amused. She started laughing again.

"The look on your face when I did it was priceless. I should've taken a picture." she said. "Wait, can I take pictures of you, like, do you have a reflection?" I laughed at that.

"Yes Addi, I have a reflection." I said, as I pulled out of the parking lot. "Would you like to go shopping?"

"Yes," she replied, "but I don't have any money with me." I smiled.

"I have enough. You don't need to spend anything." I said. I parked outside the Northgate mall in a few minutes. I got out and opened Addi's door. Then we walked together into the mall. I spent most of the time waiting outside of fitting rooms most of the time, except for when Addi found something she wanted me to try on. I asked her more question, about things she liked and disliked. I was trying on some clothes that Addi picked out picked out for me when I heard her talking on the phone. I finished trying on the clothes and came out of the fitting room to see who she was talking to.

"Who are you talking to?" I asked quietly.

"Bella." she mouthed.

"Yeah, see you soon." she said to Bella. Then she put her phone back in her pocket. She unexpectedly grabbed my arm and pulled it around her waist. I wrapped my other arm around her and we stood, looking at our reflection. I smiled, and leaned in to kiss her cheek. Surprising me once again, she turned her head so that her lips met mine, and we kissed. I smiled at her when she pulled back. "Bella says we have to go home." she said, pouting like a child.

"It's probably a good idea. You don't want your uncle asking questions." I said.

"I guess," she said. "Are you buying any of that?" she asked, pointing to the clothes I was still holding. I didn't know what I wanted out of it, so I would make her choose.

"Would you like me to?" I asked. She looked through the clothes and pulled a pair of dark blue jeans and a gray long sleeve shirt out of the pile.  
"These." she said, holding them up to me. I took them, and she took the other clothes. I went to the register to pay for the clothes, while she put back the other clothes, which she claimed was an OCD of hers. She came back after I had finished paying.

"Can I get something to eat?" she asked, as we walked out of the store.

"As long as you promise not to throw it at me." I said, smiling. We started to laugh. We went to the food court and she got ice cream. I got 17 napkins, as a joke. She laughed and we sat down. She ate a little to quickly for her, and got brain freeze. Every time she did, she would push on her forehead, and I would laugh. When she finished, it was 6:15.

"Do we have to go?" she said as we walked out of the mall.

"Yes, but I can guarantee you will see me tomorrow." I said. I already had something planned. On the way home, it got a little too quiet so I turned on the radio to a classical station.

"Do you like this?" I asked. She nodded. I took one hand off the wheel and put it on hers. We held hands the rest of the way home. We were approaching Bella's house, and Addison groaned. I smiled.  
"It's alright." I said, as I pulled up in front of the house.

"I don't want to leave you." she said. I felt her distressed and sad mood. Then she started to cry. I brushed the tears from her cheek with the back of my hand. She looked up into my eyes, and I looked into her intense, beautiful green eyes. She pulled me to her, kissing me. I kissed back, and opened my mouth a little. She opened hers and traced the tip of her tongue over my bottom lip. I gasped, not sure what to do, but I didn't pull away. She pushed her tongue in my mouth and I met it with mine. We kissed like this for a while, when I had to pull back. I was smiling, because of the kiss and my self control. She smiled back sweetly. I got out of the car, and went to open her door, then I walked her up to the house. She unlocked the door, and then pulled me into a tight hug.

"I love you." she said, pulling away and looking into my eyes.

"I love you too."


	6. Chapter 6

**APOV**

When I walked in the house, Bella seemed to be waiting for me.

"Hey Bella." I said, she was sitting on the couch.

"What did you do today?" she asked.

"Went to lunch with Jasper, and then he took me shopping." I said. Then I realized that I left my purchases in the car with Jasper. "Crap." I muttered to myself.

"What?" Bella said, turning her head, I walked to the couch and sat with her.

"I left the stuff Jasper bought for me with him." I said.

"That's a good thing." she said, I looked at her with a confused expression. "How would you explain it to Charlie?" she asked.

"Oh," was all I said. We watched TV for a while, it was some stupid cartoon, and about half an hour later, Uncle Charlie came home.

"Hi girls." he said.

"Hey Uncle Charlie." I said.

"Hey Dad." Bella said.

"Have a good day?" he asked.

"Yeah," we said at the same time. That was pretty much all we said to each other for the rest of the night. At 9pm, I got ready for bed, and was half-asleep by 10. I fell asleep at 11:30, but I didn't want to. I wanted to wait for Jasper to come. I dreamed of Jasper, and it was awful. We were in the same part of the forest where he told me he was a vampire. We were sitting together, and I leaned over to kiss him. Then he pushed me away. He started yelling at me, but I couldn't comprehend what he was saying. I was crying, and then my eyes started crying blood. He claimed I was tempting him and he ran away, leaving me sitting alone, streams of red running down my face. Then I woke up. I saw Jasper sitting on the couch at me feet, looking nervous. I sat up and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"What were you dreaming about?" he asked, rubbing my back. I put my head on his shoulder, and he picked me up a bit, and shifted me on to his lap.

"You left me alone in the forest when I started crying blood." I said. He breathed a laugh. "What?"

"You have such a creative mind." he said. I closed my eyes.

"What are we doing tomorrow." I said.

"Today." he corrected.

"Fine," I said, "what are we doing today?"

"I was thinking I would tell you about me. Would you like that?" he asked.

"Yes." I said. "Where?" I asked, meaning where would we go to talk about this. He understood what I meant.

"My house." he said. "Carlisle wants to meet you." I got nervous. He rubbed my back and calmed me. "It's alright." I still had my eyes closed, and fell asleep on Jasper's lap. I loved that. I don't know why, but it made me feel closer to him. Once again, no dreams. I woke up alone, of course, but I felt something under my pillow. I looked to find a note from Jasper. 'I'm coming to pick you up at 9. Edward will be with me, and Bella will come with us. I love you, Jasper.' I smiled at the note, and folded back up, putting it in the pocket of my pajama pants. I looked at the clock to see that it was 7:30, so I got up and got ready. I took another shower, and when I was about to get dressed Bella knocked on the door.

"The clothes you bought are in my room." she said. I went into her room, and got an outfit out of the new clothes sitting on her desk. I put that on, and by that time, it was almost 9. I heard a knock on the door when I was still upstairs, and I ran down to answer it. Bella beat me to it, and had the door open. Jasper was standing there, and when I saw him, I missed a step and tripped down the stairs. Jasper ran to me, at vampire speed, and caught me. He kissed me.

"Come on." Bella said, at the door. Jasper pulled away and guided me out the door. We went to the car, and Jasper and I got in the back seat.

"Hello Addison." Edward greeted me.

"Hi." I said. We rode the whole way to their house in silence, but I did notice that Edward drove faster than Jasper. We were there soon, and I got nervous. Jasper had his arm around my shoulders. He leaned down and whispered in my ear.

"It's going to be alright." he said. I turned my face and kissed his lips. I pulled back and we got out of the car. Jasper kept his arm around my waist as we walked up to the house. Edward opened the door for us and Bella walked in first, followed by Jasper and me. We walked in the living room, and were greeted by the rest of Jasper's family.

"Hey, I'm Emmett." said a boy that I recognized from school.

"Hi." I said. His girlfriend, who Jasper said hated me, elbowed him hard in the stomach.

"Hello Addison." Jasper's 'father' Carlisle said.

"Hello Mr. Cullen." I said politely back.

"Please, call me Carlisle." he said, I blushed. Then a woman, Esme, I guessed, stepped forward.

"It's nice to meet you." she said. I just smiled.

"And that blond thing on the couch is Rosalie." Jasper said.

"Jasper." Carlisle said in a warning tone. Jasper turned to me.

"Would you like to go to my room?" he asked.

"Yes." I whispered, not meaning to be so quiet. He smiled, taking my and leading me to his bedroom. He opened the door for me, and then he walked in behind me, shutting the door.

"You don't have to be so nervous, they won't hurt you." he said, getting a CD off of a shelf. "Well," he said turning to me, "Rosalie might." Then he laughed. He put the CD in a player and I began to hear Paramore. He sat on his bed and I joined him. I scooted closer, and put my head on his shoulder. We sat, listening to the music for three songs, then I spoke.

"You said you would tell me your story." I said, quietly.

"I know, are you ready?" he asked.

"Yes," I said, nodding against his shoulder.

"Okay, here it goes." he said. Then he told me about himself, everything. About how he killed hundreds of humans, and his vampire life. Then about how he got tired of killing, and wanted to change. Then about his self control problems. "That's why Rosalie doesn't like you."

"She doesn't like me because she's afraid you'll kill me?" I asked, somewhat confused.

"She likes this life in Forks and she wants to stay here for as long as possible, but if you 'mysteriously disappear' and you've been spending a lot of time with me, people will get suspicious." he said.

"Oh," I said. I looked at the clock and saw that it was almost noon. The CD had finished a while ago, but I hadn't been paying attention to it since Jasper started talking. We were both quiet and I looked up at him. He looked sad. "Jasper." I said. I wasn't sure what else to say, but, for some reason, I just wanted to say his name. Then I felt sad for him, and I started crying. I looked into his eyes again, and they held the same sadness that I had known so many times in my own life. In that one moment, I felt the closest to him that I had ever felt, and I had to eliminate the space between us. I leaned up and kissed his lips hard. Without breaking the kiss, he pulled me into his lap. He was sitting up and I was straddling him, kissing him. He opened his mouth, and I pushed my tongue through our lips into his mouth. We kissed intensely, and I had no intention of stopping any time soon. I had my hands in his hair, and he had his hands on my waist. I shifted against his hips and he moaned into my mouth. I moaned softly, but then Jasper pulled away, moving me off of his lap. He smiled at me deviously.

"You are really testing my self control." he said, still smiling. I giggled. All traces of sadness were gone from both of us. We sat, looking at each other, and smiling, until I realized that I was really hungry.

"I'm hungry." I said quietly.

"Alright." Jasper said, getting off the bed, "I can make you something." He helped me off the bed, and lead me out of the room. We went into the kitchen and he opened the refrigerator. "What would you like?" he asked.

"Do you have ramen?" I asked. I could see Jasper smile.  
"Yes," he said, and he made me ramen. I ate it and he just watched me. He kept his eyes on me the whole time I ate, and, even though he noticed I was about to do it, he allowed me to throw some ramen at him. "Why are you so interested in throwing food at me?"

"'Cause you can't eat it." I replied, finishing the ramen. He laughed, but quickly turned serious.

"I told you my story, now tell me yours." he said. Memories of my old life flowed into my head, and I got sad. "Would you like to go back to my room?" he asked. I shook my head.

"I want to go back to the place where you told me what you are." I said. Jasper nodded and took my hand. He walked with me outside and then put me on his back, running with me to the place I wanted to go. He helped me off his back, and we sat on the damp ground, not talking. Finally I decided to speak up.

"Are you ready to hear?" I asked.

"Yes," Jasper said, so I started.

"I wasn't the first born, I had an amazing older brother." I said, remembering my brother fondly. "His name was Ben, and he was 5 years older than me. He was the favorite child. He was smart, talented, hard working, but I wasn't. He didn't care about that though. He always said I was his best friend, and he cared for me more than my parents ever did. I don't know why he did it, I guess he got fed up with the pressure to be perfect, but when Ben was 17, he went out one night to a party. He got drunk, and he drove home." I said, my eyes starting to tear. "He never made it home. He ran off the road and crashed into a tree. My parents were devastated, and I was too, but every time I tried to talk to them about it, they would say I had no idea what they were going through. They both started drinking, and, about a year after Ben's accident, my mother stopped coming home. My father and I never saw her, and we gave up all hope of seeing her again six months after that. When I was 14, my father started hitting me. I don't know why he did it, but he said I deserved it because I made Mom leave, and I made Ben crash into the tree." I was crying now. "At first it wasn't bad, just a few smacks or something like that. Then he started breaking my bones, and, a few days after I turned 16, he hit me so hard I went into a coma. I woke up from it two weeks after it happened, and I was in a hospital. I hated it there. No one believed me, at first, when I said my father did it. Then they found evidence against him, and they locked him up. They told me I could live with any relative I wanted, and I chose Bella, because she had been there for me through everything since the day Ben died." I said, Jasper was comforting me while I cried. We were silent for a moment.

"May I ask you something?" he asked quietly. I nodded. "What about the cuts?"

"Oh," I said, "when I turned 13, it was the worst day of my life. I was becoming a teenager, but no one cared. No one was around for me. I had seen on TV, that some people, to take away the emotional pain, would put themselves in physical pain, and it helped. I tried it on my 13th birthday, and I did it every time I had the slightest emotional discomfort. It helped." I finished. My story was done, and Jasper and I just sat in the forest, silent. Finally, I stopped thinking about the awful things, and started thinking about life in Forks. It was so good, that I smiled. Jasper saw my smile, and smiled back at me. I looked into his eyes. "I love you." I said.

"I love you too." he said, smiling wider. I took my phone out of my pocket to check the time. It was 4:20. Jasper looked over at the time. "Would you like to go back to my house?" he asked. I wasn't sure what to do.

"No," I said, "let's stay here." We sat there and talked about random light subjects for two hours, and then my phone vibrated. Bella was calling me.

"Hey," I answered.

"Hey, you need to come home now." she said, as if she were my parent.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because Charlie will be home soon, and if you're gone you have to explain." she said. I rolled my eyes.

"Alright. I'll get Jasper to take me home now." I said.

"Okay, bye." she said, hanging up. I turned to Jasper, and he looked a little disappointed. I'm sure I looked worse, because he put a hand on my face and smiled. He kissed my lips softly.

"It's okay. We'll be together again soon." he said. I smiled. Instead of getting a car to take me home, Jasper ran with me on his back. I loved the way it felt. When we arrived at my house, he put me down and looked into my eyes. He kissed me lightly, and smiled. "I love you Addison."

"I love you too Jasper."

**JPOV**

I walked slowly back to the Volvo, and got in, driving quickly, but not too quickly, back home. When I got there I could feel an air of nervousness. Edward was waiting for me, and he came out of the house the second I stopped the car. I got out, and walked past him.

"What happened today?" he asked.

_Nothing, _I thought.

"What did you two do?" he asked.

_Played basketball, went to Seattle. That's it. _I thought, not wanting Rosalie to hear our conversation, but knowing she was listening. _Oh, and I kissed her._

"What kind of kiss?" Edward asked, suspicious.

_A _real_ kiss. _I thought, then I thought about the kiss, every detail. Edward made a disgusted noise, and I smirked. _You asked._ I went to my room and waited for a safe time to go see Addison. I left at 11:30 and ran quickly to see her. When I got there she looked as if she had just fallen asleep. I watched her, and she started moving.

"No." she whispered, still asleep, and she was crying. I wanted to wake her up, but I didn't want to scare her. I just watched nervously as she cried in her sleep, then she shot up on the couch. She wrapped her arms tightly around me and I pulled her into my lap.

"What were you dreaming about?" I asked, she put her head down on my shoulder and I started rubbing her back.

"You left me alone in the forest when I started crying blood." she said. She could always come up with the craziest things to dream about. I didn't know how she could do that. I laughed. "What?"

"You have such a creative mind." I said. I felt her close her eyes against my shoulder.

"What are we doing tomorrow?" she asked lethargically. I looked at the clock, noticing that it was 3am.

"Today." I corrected, smiling.

"Fine." she said, "What are we doing today?"

"I was thinking I would tell you about me. Would you like that?" I asked.

"Yes." she said. "Where?"

"My house." I said. "Carlisle wants to meet you." I felt her get nervous. I quickly calmed her. "It's alright." I said, she was asleep soon. I let her sleep in my arms, loving the feeling. At about 5, I laid her back down on the couch, and left a note under her pillow. Then I went home to tell my family that she was coming.

"I invited Addison to come over and meet you." I said to my family. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"Just what we need, more humans in this house." she said.

"I think it's a good idea." Carlisle said, ignoring Rosalie. I nodded. I went up to my bedroom to clean up. Then it was time to pick up Addi. Edward drove, and when we were at Addi's house, I got out of the car and knocked on the door. Bella answered. Just as she opened the door, I saw Addi walking, and then tripping, down the stairs. I ran to catch her before she fell, and then kissed her.

"Come on," Bella called from the door. I walked Addison out of the house and to the Volvo, opening the door for her, and then getting in beside her. We rode the entire way in silence, and I had to calm Addi many times. When we arrived at my house, she got the most nervous; I calmed her and leaned down to whisper in her ear.

"It's going to be alright." I said. She turned her head, and kissed me softly. We got out of the car, and went into the house. I kept my arm around her the entire time. We walked into the living room to see my family. The first one to say anything was Emmett.

"Hey, I'm Emmett." he said confidently. Then Rosalie inconspicuously hit him.

"Hi." Addi said nervously.

"Hello Addison." Carlisle said.

"Hello Mr. Cullen." Addison said back politely. I smiled.

"Please call me Carlisle." he said, making her blush. Then Esme stepped forward.

"It's nice to meet you." she said. Rosalie was the only one that hadn't made an introduction, so I made it for her.

"And that blond thing on the couch is Rosalie." I said, smiling.

"Jasper," Carlisle said in a warning tone. I decided it was time for Addison and me to be alone.

"Would you like to go to my room?" I asked quietly.

"Yes." she whispered. I smiled wider, and lead her to my bedroom. When we were in and the door was closed. I started looking for my Paramore CD.

"You don't have to be so nervous, they won't hurt you." I said. I found the CD and put it in the player. Then I turned to Addi. "Well, Rosalie might." I said, then I laughed. I sat on the bed and she joined me. She put her head on my shoulder. We listened to three songs, and then Addison spoke

"You said you would tell me your story." she whispered.

"I know, are you ready?" I asked cautiously.

"Yes," she said, nodding against my shoulder.

"Okay, here it goes." I said. I told her everything about me, and showed her my scars. It took a long time, but she was patient and she listened to everything I had to say. I told her about my self control problems and then I added, "That's why Rosalie doesn't like you."

"She doesn't like me because she's afraid you'll kill me?" she asked, confused.

"She likes this life in Forks and she wants to stay here for as long as possible, but if you 'mysteriously disappear' and you've been spending a lot of time with me, people will get suspicious." I said solemnly.

"Oh," she breathed. We sat for a few minutes in silence. "Jasper," she whispered, breaking the silence. I wanted to answer her, but I wasn't sure what to say, then she started crying. I felt sad for her, and because of what I had told her. She looked into my eyes, her bright green eyes troubled and sad. Without another word, she leaned up and kissed my lips hard. I kissed back, pulling her into my lap. She sat, straddling me, and we kissed. I opened my mouth and pushed her tongue into my mouth. We kissed like this, and I never wanted it to stop. Her fingers were tangled in my hair and I was holding her waist. She moved against my hips, and I moaned. She echoed me, but that was too much. I had to pull away. I took her off my lap and sat her on the bed, then I smiled at her.

"You are really testing my self control." I said, still smiling. She giggled. We sat in silence, smiling at each other when Addi spoke.

"I'm hungry." she said.

"Alright," I said getting off the bed, "I can make you something." I helped her off the bed, and then wrapped my arm around her shoulders, walking with her to the kitchen. "What would you like?" I asked.

"Do you have ramen?" she asked. I smiled.

"Yes," I said, and I made her ramen. I just sat, watching her eat, and I could see that she wanted to throw her food at me again. I allowed it. "Why are you so interested in throwing food at me?"

"'Cause you can't eat it." she replied simply. I laughed a little, but then turned serious.

"I told you my story, now tell me yours." I said quietly. I felt her become sad. "Would you like to go back to my room?" I asked.

"I want to go back to the place where you told me what you are." she said. I nodded and took her hand, leading her out of the house. Then I helped her on my back and ran with her to the spot where I told her I was vampire. I helped her off my back, and we sat on the ground.

"Are you ready to hear?" she asked.

"Yes." I said, and she started. She told me about her life. The big brother she had, and how he died. How she was abused and neglected. She cried when she was finished, but there was still something I was curious about.

"May I ask you something?" she nodded, "What about the cuts?" Then she told me how cutting relieved her pain, and how she had been doing it for almost 5 years. We were silent after that, but after a while, Addi smiled. I smiled back at her, noticing her mood improve. She looked into my eyes.

"I love you." she said suddenly.

"I love you too." I said, widening my smile. Then she took her phone out of her pocket, and it read 4:20pm. "Would you like to go back to my house?" I asked.

"No," she said, "let's stay here." We stayed, sitting and talking about our favorite things. I could have talked to her for hours, just about this. Then her phone vibrated. Bella was calling her. They had a short conversation about why she should go home, and then they hung up. She turned to me, and I'm sure my features held disappointment. She was sad, and I could feel it clearly. I placed my hand on her cheek and kissed her lips softly.

"It's okay. We'll be together again soon." I said. She looked down and smiled. Instead of taking her to her house by car, I ran with her on my back. We arrived at her house, and I helped her off my back, walking her, at human speed, to her door. I kissed her. "I love you Addison." I said, I could never say that enough times.

"I love you too Jasper."


	7. Chapter 7

**APOV**

I walked in the house, and was the happiest I had been in years. I walked in the kitchen to find Bella reading.

"Did you have a good time today?" Bella asked, actually happy.

"Yes I did. And you?" I asked, joining her at the table.

"Yes," she said, smiling.

"So," I started, "are you making dinner?" I asked.

"Please, give me one night off. Make yourself some ramen or something." she said. That made me laugh. I wasn't really hungry, so I just went to take a shower. I washed my hair, and dried it. Then I brushed my teeth. I was ready for bed at 7.

"Hi Uncle Charlie." I said, as I walked down the stairs. It was the first time I'd seen him all day.

"Hey Addison. Did you have a good day?" he asked, as usual.

"Yep." I replied simply. I went into the kitchen, drank a glass of water, and then sat and read. I was reading Go Ask Alice. Jasper bought it for me the day before at the mall. I read until 9, and then I went to bed. I didn't want to sleep without Jasper, knowing that without him, I would have nightmares. I slept anyway, not being able to hold back the overwhelming tiredness that overtook me. This time I dreamed of my old life, in Texas. I dreamed of Ben, and then of his accident. Then of my father beating me. I woke up crying, but Jasper was there. I didn't say anything, just jumped into his lap, and cried. I fell asleep in his lap again, and had no dreams. When I woke up, I got ready for school, and then walked outside. There, outside of my house, was Jasper on a sleek silver motorcycle. He got off and took off his helmet, walking toward me.

"Oh my God." I said.

"Do you like it?" he asked, smiling. Before I could answer, he kissed me. He was in a very good mood. I smiled.

"I love it." I said. He handed me a helmet, and we got on. He drove very quickly to school, and then parked next to Edward's Volvo. He got off, and helped me off, then he pulled a key out of his pocket and opened the door on Edward's car. I had my helmet off, and he did too, and he took the helmets and threw them in the backseat of the Volvo. As he walked me into school, I noticed that a lot of people were staring. I just shrugged it off and wrapped my arm tighter around Jasper's waist. He walked me to all of my classes and met me for lunch. Then we sat together in gym, and he took me home after school. We did the same thing for the next few weeks, on the weekends I would go to his house, and when it was our one month anniversary, he took me to dinner in a fancy restaurant in Seattle. It was amazing, and I didn't throw food at him. He did the same thing for our two month, three month, four month, and five month anniversaries. It was April, and it was approaching on our six month anniversary, and my birthday.

"I don't want to do anything special." I said when Jasper asked me what I wanted to do on my birthday.

"You're turning 18. It should be special." he said. I groaned.

"No, nothing special." I said, crossing my arms over my chest. We were in Jasper's room, sitting on his bed, and it was two days before my birthday.

"Am I at least allowed to get you a special gift?" he asked, smiling.

"Okay," I said. He leaned closer and kissed me. I kissed back, turning it into a French kiss. Jasper and I had been working on his self control, so we could make the kisses last longer, and go deeper. He pulled away, still smiling.

"It's a school night." he said. I looked at the clock, and it was almost 8pm.

"Ugh, do I have to go home?" I asked. Jasper laughed.

"Yes," he said, kissing me again, "but I'll see you in a few hours."

"Fine." I said, getting off the bed. He followed me and we walked to the garage to get his motorcycle. He drove me quickly home, and when we got there, I didn't want to leave him.

"Addison, you don't want to get in trouble again, do you?" he asked. I groaned once again, getting off the bike and walking to the door. Jasper followed me. One night, on a Saturday, Jasper and I were kissing at the door and Uncle Charlie saw. He made me explain everything, and I was banned from seeing Jasper for the next weekend, but Jasper just snuck in my house. Jasper stopped me as I was about to open the door. I turned and looked into his gold eyes. He kissed me, a small kiss, and then I went into the house. I got ready for bed, unhappy because I knew that even though I would see Jasper for a while tonight, I wouldn't see him tomorrow at school. He had to hunt, because of his plans for us on Saturday. I was ready for bed by 10, and I knew Jasper would come at 11. I read Diary of a Wimpy Kid until 11, and then Jasper came silently through the door. He came quickly to me, and I crawled into his lap when he sat down.

"I'll miss you tomorrow." I said quietly. He kissed me.

"I'll miss you too." he said. "Sleep now." I fell asleep quickly, it was so easy to fall asleep with Jasper there, and had no dreams. I woke alone, and got ready for bed slowly, skipping breakfast. Bella was driving me to school today, the way she did every time Jasper and Edward hunted.

"It's getting worse." she said, as we started driving to school.

"What's getting worse?" I asked quietly.

"The way you act when Jasper hunts." she said. "It's not like he'll be gone forever."

"I hate every minute we spend away from each other." I said. "I don't feel as safe."

"It's okay." Bella said in a more understanding voice. School dragged horribly without Jasper there. When it was over, Bella drove me home and I got ready for bed. I was feeling really tired. I fell asleep around 6pm, and woke up at 12:30am. Jasper was there. I didn't bother to ask the time, I just looked at the clock.

"I've been sleeping for six hours." I said, smiling. Jasper smiled too.

"Wow, tired?" he asked.

"Not anymore." I said, sitting up. I crawled into his lap again, and put my head on his shoulder. He kissed my hair.

"Bella's taking you to my house tomorrow at 11." he said.

"Okay." I said, feeling tired again. "I love you."

"I love you too." he said. I fell asleep soon, and was woken up by Bella.

"Get up, it's almost time to go. Oh, and, Happy 18th birthday." she said.

"Thanks." I said. I looked at the clock and it was 10:40. I got ready quickly, putting on my favorite shirt, and a pair of black skinny jeans. When I was ready, Bella drove to the Cullen's house. I was nervous. I didn't know what to expect. We got there, and Bella parked in front of the house. We got out, and went inside.

"I have to go see Edward." Bella said.

"Okay," I said, walking into the living room. She walked away, and I sat on the couch. Then Rosalie, who never said anything to me, walked in.

"It's your birthday." she said.

"Yep." I replied.

"It doesn't matter." she said quietly, seeming to speak to herself. I didn't reply. Then she looked at me. "You know he'll kill you right? You won't last a day. And if he does turn you into a vampire, you'll forget all about him, and only think about blood." she said. I just sat there, stunned. "I've been waiting for the opportunity to tell you, you don't matter. To anyone. At least, you won't. Not when you're a vampire, if you get that far. Maybe he'll just drain you, and then we'll have to leave and it will be all your fault. I thought Bella was bad, but when you came into the picture, everything got a lot worse. You made everything harder on us, this family. Even Edward doesn't like you. He just pretends for Bella's sake. You shouldn't be here. You should be locked up somewhere where you can't hurt anyone, besides yourself. Maybe that would do everyone some good." Then she walked out of the room. I was crying, and she knew that. She seemed pleased with my reaction. I felt horrible. I was making everything bad for the family that I loved so much. I would have been better dead. I ran out of the house into the forest. I was deep in the forest when I fell. I looked around in the grass and found a sharp pointed rock. If I was better off dead, I would do it now. I sunk the rock deep into my skin, and watched the deep red flow out. I smashed the rock into my skin again, making a larger cut underneath the original one. I was losing blood, but I barely noticed. I felt cold, and then...

*****

I woke up in a white room. I blinked a few time, and then registered that I was in a hospital. I looked around, and saw Jasper.

"Addison!" he said happily coming quickly closer to me, kissing my forehead. I was upset. Why was I still alive? Soon I saw Bella, Uncle Charlie, and Edward enter the room.

"Thank God." Charlie said. Bella and Edward just ran over to me and hugged me.

"Edward." I said.

"Yes?"

"You...care...about me?" I chocked out.

"Of course. You're like a sister to me Addison. I love you." he said. I smiled.

"And I love you too." Bella said. I was happy that they cared. Then my eyes turned to Jasper.

"May we have a minute alone?" he asked, not breaking eye contact with me. Everyone else in the room muttered a 'yes' and left. Jasper closed the door behind them.

"Rosalie told Carlisle everything she said. She is in big trouble with him." Jasper said. "And, Addison, you matter to everyone in my family." I just smiled. "I never got to give you your birthday present." he said. I rolled my eyes.

"It doesn't matter." I said, watching him as he got on one knee. He pulled out a small box, and it clicked. I gasped. He opened the box to reveal a ring.

"Addison, will you marry me?"

**JPOV**

I ran home, and when I got there, I decided that I needed a car of my own.

"Emmett!" I yelled, not needing to yell. He came down the stairs.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"I need your help with something." I said. We went into the garage and I started talking again. "I want a car, or something. What should I get?" I asked, knowing he would be able to help. After a few minutes of arguing with himself about what type of car would best suite me, he came up with an idea.

"Go get your laptop." he said, not even telling me what he wanted it for. I ran to my room and got the laptop, then ran back to the garage. Emmett took the laptop from me and connected to the Internet quickly. He did some things, and then turned it to face me. "Ta da!" he said. On the screen there was a picture of a silver motorcycle. "It's perfect for you." I smiled. It was perfect. Emmett and I went out in his Jeep all the way to Seattle to the nearest dealership, and bought the bike. I drove it home, and was extremely happy with it. When we got home, I parked the bike and ran to Addison. When I got there, she was crying, but still asleep. She woke up soon, and immediately crawled into my lap. I just held her, rubbing her back and kissing her hair. She fell asleep, and I held her until 5am. Then I put her down, and left. I ran home, changed my clothes, and went to get my bike. There were two helmets there, and a note in one of them.

'This one's for Addison. Don't tell Rose.' it read in Emmett's handwriting. I smiled, and put it in my pocket. Then I put my helmet on, and rode to pick Addison up for school. I sat out on the bike, waiting for her to come out of the house. When she walked out, I got off the bike and took my helmet off.

"Oh my God." she said, looking past me at the motorcycle

"Do you like it?" I asked. She looked at me. I walked closer to her and kissed her. She smiled at me.

"I love it." she said. I handed her the helmet Emmett bought for her, and she put it on, getting on the bike with me. We rode to school quickly and I could tell she enjoyed the ride. We parked next to Edward's Volvo, and when she handed me her helmet, I threw it the back of his car. I walked her into the school, and people stared. She just wrapped her arm tight around my waist, and I wrapped mine tight around her shoulders. I walked her to all of her classes and sat with her in gym. Then I drove her home. We did the same thing for the next few weeks, on the weekends she would come to my house, and when it was our one month anniversary, I took her to dinner in a nice restaurant in Seattle. She loved it, and she didn't throw food at me. I did the same thing for our two month, three month, four month, and five month anniversaries. It was April, and it was approaching on our six month anniversary, and her 18th birthday.

"I don't want to do anything special." she said for the tenth time.

"You're turning 18. It should be special." I said, she groaned

"No, nothing special." she said, crossing her arms. We were in my bedroom, sitting on my bed, and her birthday was in two days.

"Am I at least allowed to get you a special gift?" I asked, smiling. I already knew what I was going to give her.

"Okay," she said. We kissed. We had been working to improve my self control, and the work was paying off. I pulled away, still smiling.

"It's a school night." I reminded her. She looked at the clock.

"Ugh, do I have to go home?" she asked, lying down. I laughed.

"Yes," I said, leaning over her and kissing her again, "but I'll see you in a few hours."

"Fine." she said, climbing off the bed. I followed her and we walked to the garage to get my motorcycle. I drove quickly to her house, and when we got there, she held onto me tightly.

"Addison, you don't want to get in trouble again, do you?" I asked. She groaned again, letting go of me and getting off the bike. One day, a few months ago, I was with Addi inside her house, and just as I kissed her, her uncle walked in. He yelled and made her explain everything. She told him everything except me sneaking in at night, and she was banned from seeing me for the next weekend.

I stopped her at the door, and turned her to face me. I looked into the green eyes that still amazed me, and kissed her passionately. Then she went into the house. I went back to my house, and sat for a few hours, not doing anything. I went to Addison at 11. When I sat down on the couch, she got settled in my lap.

"I'll miss you tomorrow." she said, sadly. I kissed her.

"I'll miss you too." I said. "Sleep now." I rubbed her back, and she fell asleep soon. I didn't want to leave her at 5, but I had to. I went back to my house, and Edward and I hunted. That night, I went to see Addison. She slept for the first hour and half that I was there, then she randomly woke. She looked at me, then turned to look at the clock.

"I've been sleeping for six and a half hours." she said smiling. I smiled back.

Wow, tired?" I asked.

"Not anymore." she said, sitting up. She crawled into my lap again, and put her head on my shoulder. I kissed her hair.

"Bella's taking you to my house tomorrow at 11." I said.

"Okay." she said, sounding tired. "I love you."

"I love you too." I said. She fell asleep soon. I loved holding her while she slept. I left at 5, and ran home quickly. I got on my motorcycle and headed to the custom jewelers in Seattle to pick up Addison's gift. While there, I also bought her red roses. Red was her favorite color. I drove home, and, just as I predicted, there was traffic. I couldn't get around it without making a scene, so I just drove slow like everyone else. I constantly checked the time, and when I got out of the traffic, half past eleven. I was near the house, but I smelled something odd as I got closer. It smelled like human blood, but something about it scared me. The smell was too potent, as if the human was bleeding at the moment. Worried, I ran to the source, and worked hard to maintain my self control, then I saw it. Addison, lying on the forest floor, unconscious, with a pool of blood on her left side. She had attempted suicide, I could tell. I held my breath, and ran as fast as I could to Carlisle. When I got to him, he was worried. He took her from me, and stopped the bleeding, then he took her to a hospital. I had to take a shower before I could be near her; her blood was all over me. After my shower and a change of clothes, I got on my bike and went as fast as possible to the hospital. She was there, in a hospital bed, with stitches in her wrist. They let me in, and I didn't go away from her for a minute. Carlisle came in and explained everything that happened. I was so angry with Rosalie, but none of that mattered, not until Addison woke up. On Sunday, in the morning, she woke up. She opened her eyes, and then looked at me.

"Addison!" I exclaimed, happy to see her awake. I kissed her forehead lightly. She wasn't happy. Bella, Edward, and Charlie walked in the room only a minute later.

"Thank God." Charlie said at the door. Bella and Edward ran to her, hugging and kissing her.

"Edward." she said in a weak voice.

"Yes?" he answered.

"You...care...about me?" she asked, sounding close to tears.

"Of course. You're like a sister to me Addison. I love you." he said. She smiled.

"And I love you too." Bella said. She was happy again, then she looked at me.

"May we have a minute alone?" I asked, not breaking eye contact with her. Everyone in the room muttered a 'yes' and left. I closed the door behind them.

"Rosalie told Carlisle everything she said. She is in big trouble with him." I said. "And, Addison, you matter to everyone in my family." She smiled at me. "I never got to give you your birthday present." I said, becoming nervous.

"It doesn't matter." she said. Her watching, I got on one knee, and pulled out the box that contained her present. She gasped. I opened it, and was even more nervous as I said,

"Addison, will you marry me?"


	8. Chapter 8

**APOV**

"Yes!" I said happily. He put the ring on my finger, and kissed my hand. "But-" I started.

"But what?" he asked, losing his smile.

"I want to be like you Jasper. I want to be a vampire." I said. After what had just happened, I didn't want anything like it to happen again.

"Why?" he asked.

"You know why. I don't want to be able to do this to myself again." I said, holding out my wrist.

"I'll keep it from happening." he said, trying to comfort me.

"No, Jasper. I want to be a vampire." I said seriously. He looked defeated.

"After the wedding." he said. Then he stood up and sat on the bed. I hugged him tightly.

"Thank you. I love you so much Jasper." I said.

"I love you Addison." he said back. I left the hospital that afternoon, and went back to Uncle Charlie's house. Of course I had to tell him about the fact that I was getting married soon. He didn't protest, which kind of surprised me. It took about a month and a half to everything ready for the wedding, and then we were married. It was a small thing, just the Cullen's, Bella, and Uncle Charlie, but it was the happiest day of my life. That night, Jasper and I sat in his room, talking.

"Now." I said.

"No, can't we wait." he said, trying to postpone my change into a vampire.

"You said after the wedding." I quoted him. He sighed.

"Addison, please." he said. Nothing could convince me out of it.

"No," I said, "you promised."

"You'll be in pain for days." he said. "Can we at least have one night together while you're still human?" He looked sad, but how could I say no. I nodded, and he kissed me. This time we went further. We kissed passionately, and then, we made love for the first time. It was amazing. Jasper kept his self control well, and I was very happy. When I woke up the next morning, Jasper was sitting up in bed, watching me.

"Good morning." I said, smiling. He smiled too.

"Good morning." he said back. "I love you."

"I love you too." I said, closing my eyes. I fell asleep again, and woke an hour later.

"Are you really awake this time?" he asked. I giggled.

"Yes," I said, sitting up a little. Jasper kissed me. "I need a human moment." I said. Jasper laughed.

"Alright," he said, kissing me again. I got out of bed and took a shower. Then I brushed my teeth, and walked back to the bed. Jasper was still sitting in it with the sheets covering half his body. "How long do I have to be human?" I asked quietly, sitting on the bed, not looking at him. He sighed.

"It's your decision." he said, equally as quiet. I looked at him.

"I'm ready." I said, looking into his gold eyes. He had already told me everything that would happen when I was changed, and I knew I was ready for it. He looked sad. I crawled over to him, and kissed him.

"I can't do it to you." he said. He had already told me that, but Carlisle had already agreed to change me as soon as I was ready.

"I know." I said. He kissed me. We got dressed, and walked down stairs. Carlisle was in the living room. He already looked like he knew what I wanted, Edward must have told him. Without speaking, he stood up and led Jasper and me to his office. We walked in, and all that was in the room was a bed, two chairs, and a clock.

"Lie down." Carlisle said to me. I did as I was told. "It's going to hurt, are you ready?" he asked. I looked at Jasper.

"I love you." he said, taking my hand lovingly, and kissing my forehead.

"I love you too." I said. Carlisle took the hint, and bit.


End file.
